Redemption (Dudley Dursley)

XXXV. Nightfall.

Deep down, he knew it was going to be a long healing process before they were back to the way they had been before all of this occurred. Just to think that had been a little over a year ago was surprising. He's had a hectic few years from graduating to opening a very successful business, but this one took the cake with icing and a cherry on top. He'd never thought he would be someone to sit a few metres away from a live-action battle where people were dying in front of him and being seriously injured in front of him. Yet he had.

And some of it had been his own doing.

When he'd done it, he had been so filled with fury that he thought he would suffer zero repercussions upon bringing the knife down repeatedly on Kyra. But after a couple of days once the shock had finally worn off, they hit him hard. There were a few times during the day he had to run to the bathroom as he thought he was going to be sick. Then there was his mind playing tricks on him. For a few days, any time he looked at his bare skin, he saw warm sticky blood. Did he regret doing it? Absolutely not. However, this didn't stop the horrid feeling of knowing he had murdered someone.

Harry had decided to give both him and Felicity some space, knowing from experience what the few days after a large battle feels like. Or maybe it was because he was feeling the same way. Space is what they all needed right now, but he cannot deny that he did want to have dozens of people surrounding him to distract him. Then again, a distraction would be just that, and that wouldn't be a good way to put everything behind them. If he thought he was in a bad shape, all he had to do was go into the spare bedroom.

Felicity had barely come out since she had gotten back. She started by being in their own bedroom, but she could not sleep for long before waking up screaming. She would also scratch at where previous scars had been despite Harry taking care of them. It had gotten to the point that her skin was red-raw and occasionally broke through. He did ask Harry how to proceed with her, because he didn't want her to be like this when their child is born. It is not a good mental state to bring up a baby in. But the younger simply said patience would be the best.

So, there was guilt of being a murderer, guilt over not being able to directly help Felicity, and then there was the guilt over keeping his mother in the dark over everything. However, one part of guilt he can possibly get over. Which was why he was currently sitting on a train heading down to Surrey. He hadn't been back for a long time, he had barely spoken to Petunia since it all kicked off. He felt awful over keeping her in the dark, but he knew at the time there was a high chance that it would cause her to revert to her old ways. That was one of the last things he wanted.

How was he going to tell her? Not only all of this, but that Vernon sacrificed himself to save him? It had been a very bitter divorce, and he was unsure how she would react upon hearing his name. Hopefully she takes it well. At least now it's all over. Once the confirmation had come that the battle had been won and Bellatrix had been beaten, he had wasted no time in throwing the glass ball out of his bedroom window. Dudley had taken great pride at watching it shatter as it came into contact on the ground and the mist inside disappeared like winter fog.

There was nothing more to worry about, or at least he hoped not. The only stress he will be enduring now will be his work and being a parent. To think in a few weeks, he'll have a child of his own... it's crazy to think about. Especially considering he always said when he was younger, he never wanted kids. Hell, when he was younger, he didn't even want to get married. Funny how things change. At one point the thought of wilfully speaking to Harry would've repulsed him, they were now close. At one point he had thought marriage was stupid, yet now he was married. At one point the idea of him becoming a parent was about as likely as a parrot mating with a lion, and he is now going to be a parent.

He'd taken the local newspaper with him to do the puzzles inside. These were the only things he ever bought a newspaper for as in his mind it's all ridiculous. So many stories get fabricated nowadays, is there really such a thing as a story which is 100% truth? If there was, he had never seen it. He's already heard some rumours spreading in his street of why Felicity or himself had barely been seen the last few days. Some people were gossiping they had separated, some were saying they were in the process of moving, and the others just left them be. It's not like he could tell them the truth, there's no doubt they would order a psychiatrist to help if he did.