Insanity / Discontinuing Till Further Notice

Chapter 9: Breakup

Before Toby left he cleared his throat to say one last thing.

"Oh Rose?"

"Yes, Toby?"

"Fear is a powerful emotion, especially a fear of the unknown. Don't let it control you. Otherwise, you'll never become greater than you already are." He smiled at me. "That's all. I'll be leaving now."

I tried not to make eye contact as he left the room. 

What the hell was he talking about? Did something go wrong that I don't know about? Toby had been my boyfriend for years, longer than I could remember. Maybe he knew things about my parents that I didn't. Perhaps there were secrets I wasn't allowed to know about...

 I was getting ahead of myself what would he know?

Even if that was true, it didn't change my condition or anything about me. I was still Rose.

Awkward, and possibly insane Rose.

>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>>

A few hours went by, with my day being relatively normal. I tried to avoid hearing any and all discussion about my performance from earlier. Even so, it was obvious that for today, I was the center of gossip in the town. For the most part, however, things stayed quiet. Jake didn't bring it up at all, which made me happy. The less that people worried about it, the better.

Toby didn't talk to me. Our eyes locked as we passed each other in the house a couple of times, I don't know why but he was acting differently. Was it because of me?

I walked to the kitchen, my heart heavy and confused. I didn't have time for all this relationship nonsense, not when I could barely discern fantasy and reality. But I still had to fix it, for Toby. And from what I could tell, there was only one way to do it.

I pulled out my phone from a pocket. Coming to my message log with Toby, I took a deep breath.

This is for the best, you know it. Don't be stupid.

Rapidly, I started texting.

"Hey, look...  Can you meet me in the kitchen for a talk?" After typing it I sent the message. I waited. I tried to ease my aching conscience by reading it a few times over.

This was the best thing to do, right?

The phone rumbled and I read the new message as fast as I could.

"Sure."

A few minutes later I heard him walking down the stairs I sat down to make myself comfortable waiting at the table with the phone in my hands. He sat down right in front of me and my nerves were going away little by little. The effects he has on me and my body is unrelatable. 

"Look Toby..." I trailed off.

"Before you start I think I know where you're going with this I hate pressuring you, but I think it's for the best, don't you? This will only make us closer. I need to know if you're alright I don't mean for this to go this far." He cut me off and looked at me with the most reassuring eyes.

I took a deep breath with tears that stung my eyes from left to right.  

"It's not about that I thought we passed that argument a long time ago. I just thought if it was best if we gave each other space I don't want you to suffer with me anymore you need to go on and live your life."

"It doesn't have to be that way Ruby I really like you we know everything about each other and I don't ever want to lose you." His words hurt my heart I knew he meant every word but I know what's best for him and what he needs to do is leave, leave and never go back to me. I could see specks of tears gently falling from his cheeks I never thought that I would be causing him so much pain. 

"Tell me you'll never leave Ruby." Toby sobbed. He grabbed my hands tightly but softly. 

"I'm never gonna leave Toby," I stated with sympathy. 

His words gave me strength to keep moving forward I definitely now know that I won't leave, leaving him will just make me worse. I should have known this was a bad idea I had to trust him even though he was protective it was the good kind of protective. 

 If I could just ignore the twinge of regret, everything would be fine. I needed Toby. I counted on him a lot, maybe even too much. It was the least I could do to pay him back for all the trouble.

I heard girls talk about their experience with their boyfriends all the time. It was usually positive. Why couldn't I be like them? Why couldn't I want this?

After a few minutes later of hugging reassuring that we will get through this together I kissed Toby and Toby left to his room giving me an adorable smirk. That I couldn't help but laugh at.  

"Did everything work out?"

I straightened, startled at Jakes's voice beside me. I had barely noticed him sliding up next to me.

"Yeah. In the end, I decided it was better just to go along with it. Couples do this all the time, I just need to get used to the idea," I said with a sigh.

"It was a big decision you know," Jake said. His voice had turned serious. "And if you two ever break up, both of you guys would have been lost without each other."

"I know," I said, exasperated. "I get it...  That's why I wouldn't think about breaking up with him anymore. "

"Whatever you wanna do my friend, it's your choice," He said coolly. 

Jake walked away before I could come up with a retort.

I leaned against the chair, emotionally exhausted. This day was ruining me already.

"Ruby"

A feminine voice echoed through my head. It was the same one from my nightmare. As I looked around to identify the voice, I saw her.

The black-haired girl stood in the center of the kitchen, staring at me.

I clenched up, despite wanting to keep calm. I forced myself off the chair and started standing up and walking to get closer to her.

Come play...

"Toby?" I questioned with a loud pitched voice. 

"Toby can't hear you, Im the only one who can," she snarled. 

Once I was only a few feet away from her, she turned and started walking. Common sense fluttering away, I followed her. The girl led me through several places until she moved inside the outside hallway bathroom. I stopped at the entrance. Why was I being lead to a bathroom? 

Great. There's probably a secret portal to Hell that requires going through a toilet.

I frowned. This wasn't real, just a hallucination. I shouldn't be following her, it'd only result in another awkward situation. Yet, would she ever stop calling if I didn't? 

Ruby....

I could hear a toilet flush. At the very least, there she was. 

With a huff, I walked in.

she stood in the center, I could swear there was a smile on her petrifying face.

"Hello?"