Expiration || M.C

9 || In love with the dying boy

Spencer

Luke and I hadn't really spoken in a few days. There was the standard ''Hello,'' and ''Can you pass the salt.'' But that was about it. I hadn't seen a smile on his face in five days.

We went to see Michael together four days ago, but Luke didn't say anything to me or nurse Hood and he didn't talk to Michael when I was in the room, either. He just stared at him. When I came back after I had left the room to get some food, Luke was crying and holding Michael hand while whispering words at him.

I decided to leave him alone and left a note I took the bus home. I didn't want to explain why Luke was upset to nurse Hood but he already seemed to know by the look he gave me when I walked past him to go home.

Liz didn't really ask anything, either. She tried to make conversation every now and then at dinner but quickly realized it had no point. So the house was silent, a lot.

I haven't visited Michael in a few days because Luke is gone before me all the time and I don't want to run into him at the hospital and make him stressed. He needed time.

Today it seems like Luke is sleeping in, since I haven't seen him at all and I have been awake since eight a.m. Liz was already off to work. Just as I want to go get dressed to take a bus to the hospital, Luke comes running downstairs, completely dressed.

''Goodmorning.'' I wait for him to look at me.

''Morning.'' He mumbles back as he walks towards the hall, looking in the mirror and putting a beanie on his head.

''Luke?'' I frown as he's looking in the mirror like I'm not there. He gets his coat and walks towards the door and puts his hand on the door handle.

''Luke,'' I say, louder. Which doesn't cause a reaction either as he opens the door.

"Luke!" I say, loudly causing the veins in his arms to tense. He slowly turns around to face me and closes the door.

''What?'' He says, clearly annoyed. He's holding the door handle and tapping his fingers on it. ''Talk to me.'' I say quietly, taking a few steps towards him.

He sighs and looks at me until I'm standing in front of him. We stand there for a moment, me looking up and him looking down, since he's so tall. ''Please.'' I close my eyes. He rolls his.

''What is there to say, Spence? He's dying. I'm dying. How do you expect me to skip around happy as the boy I love is lying in the hospital, dying?'' He frowns and seems confused at his own words. It's not something for Luke to say. I don't think he's ever said he loves anyone. I smile at him, sadly. ''I know,'' I whisper. ''Me too.''

Luke's face goes back to being annoyed. ''No, Spence. You don't.'' He says harshly as he turns around and grabs the door handle again. ''What? What do you mean?'' I say, putting my hand on his shoulder as I frown. How could he say that?

''Of course I love Michael.'' I shake my head. He sighs deeply. ''You don't love him like I do.'' Luke says, pulling his beanie back on his head. ''What do you mean, Luke?'' I ask him, confused. I can see in his face he already regrets he said anything and he rolls his eyes.

''Nothing, Spence. Go back to wasting your time as Michael is dying.'' He says, squinting his eyes and opening the door, walking towards the car.

''Fucks sake, Luke, get back here! Are you saying this is my fault? I love him, just like you do. How could you say I don't?'' I yell at him. he slams his fist on the door of his car and looks at me.

''I don't just love him, Spencer. I could never 'just love him'. And if you actually cared, where have you been these past few days? They are going to give up on him, Spencer. You know what that means? They're going to kill him. So I'm sorry, but I'm not going to spend what may be the last days of Michael's life sitting at home worrying about finishing and learning all the songs from La La Land.'' He shouts, getting in his car and driving away.