Sanctuary; A Haylor Fanfic

Chapter 5:

••A/N

It's baaaaaack;)

Chapter 5

"Taylor," Harry murmurs softly against my hair. We only officially got back together two weeks ago and we're already alnost to the way we were last year. Nothing had changed much though, maybe maturity and age, definitely circumstances. This baby brought us back together and I can't be more grateful. How I lived without him playing with my hair and his kisses daily is a mystery. It made me realize how much I've actually missed him. Single was pretty fun but having something special with someone you adore is so much better.

I glance up from my trance of tracing his butterfly tattoo. He had so many new ones since last time, new ones to trace and keep me busy. It was probably my favorite thing to do. Nothing is more soothing than hearing him sing against your hair, one hand playing with the end strands, while you trace his bare-chested tattoos. It's the best feeling in the world to just be loved in serenity. No outside media could bother this moment, it was just Harry and I, lying on the bed in early morning, just the silence between us.

"Hm?" I mumble, my cheek still pushed against his skin, warm from the heat of the blanket.

"Why do you hurt yourself?" He whispers, pushing a strand from my face so he can actually see my eyes that I've attempted to keep hidden. My eyes are the most vulnerable for me, it's like he can see through me if he looks me straight in the eyes. Every single thing I've done is seemingly open if he makes eye contact. I immediately look down.

That's such a tough question and to be confronted on it like I knew he would only made it worse.

"Insecurity, I guess. Uncertainty." I shrug, forcing all my focus harder into tracing which leads to my nail leaving red marks across his skin. He tilts my chin up so my eyes meet his reluctantly. He rubs his thumb against my cheek.

He forces a smile, "What are you insecure about, babe? You're gorgeous, talented, successful, you're everything every girl craves to be. The girl that every guy craves to have. Uncertain about what? The future? That'll be fine. I'll make sure of it. We'll have our baby and a nice little family, maybe live in a beach house or something. Our careers will do fine because the fans that do truly support us will stay with us. Everything will end up just fine."

I want to believe him, I really do, but that's not how real life goes. It's a parallel universe from what we're really like, how the fairytales go. Something has to go wrong, I mean how can we make it through all this alive. I do appreciate his optimism but are we ready for a baby? It wasn't meant to happen that I even became pregnant. I mean if I really didn't want to have sex with him, I would've stopped him. I wasn't completely drunk, I knew my surroundings but my thoughts fogged from the chances. I mean c'mon, it was New Years Eve and Harry had prodded me on. He got drunk first then convinced me to have a few before I realized I got a drunk a little quicker than most. I brought him back to the hotel where everything in my mind temporarily blurred out.

I peck his lips once to where our noses brush, "You're sweet... the uncertainty comes from that we're not ready." I murmur, tracing my finger around the outline of his lips. "You're 19, Harry."

"I'm ready. I mean if you had told me this 4 months ago, I might say that I wasn't but we've both grown since then. You have matured in more ways than I can keep up with and you're 24, isn't a baby close in your future anyway?"

"24 and 19 is a big difference, Harry."

"Don't talk to me about age, Tay, I'll be 20 in Feburary. Just please, look at me and tell me you aren't ready for this baby,"

I swallow, attempting to hold eye contact. "I- don't know." I release my breath.

He takes my hand and intertwines our fingers together, holding them up in the air and examining them. His are so much bigger than mine, overtaking most of my palm.

"You see our hands? They are meant to fit together and not in any other way. Locked together for a reason, only coming apart to be reunited later. They shouldn't be wiping your tears or gripping a knife or plunging down your throat. Your fingers, they should bare a ring, not cuts. I want to be the one that gives you that tan line on your finger, I want to be the one to make sure you don't use your hands for acts of depression. You have no reason for what you do. I want you to think of me when you feel an urge, just-look at this," He pulls out a small, woven silver ring that clasps around like a branch. It's a promise ring, it scared me a second, I thought he was proposing. "I promise that no matter what happens, you'll have me and I'll love our baby nevertheless. Just promise me to not hurt yourself."

"I'll try," I whisper softly, sliding on the ring that fits perfectly around my finger.

"And that's all I can ask,"

•

My stomach churns, ushering out a loud groan that I don't recognize at first. It definitely gets Harrys' attention as he jumps up off his slouched position on the couch, remote in hand.

"What's wrong? Is something wrong with the baby?" He bursts quickly, eyes scanning the room for any sign of his jacket to which he can't find. He mutters a few explicit and throws the remote on the couch.

"Harry, the baby isn't due for another 4 months, calm down. It's just cravings and kicking pains," I laugh, watching as his expression calms and he rubs at the back on his neck. His cheeks turn pinkish and flops down next to me on the couch arm.

"Oh. Well, what are you craving? It's lunch anyway," He asks. That's all he had to say before every single interesting food comes to mind.

"A cheeseburger, actually a double, with a large sweet tea and fries, and the milkshake from Fosters. Um, that Krave Kellogg cereal, don't forget milk. Oh! and don't forget doritos an-"

"How about you just text me, overwhelming me here," He laughs softly.

"Oh, right, sorry." I blush as he leans over and captures his lips in mine, our third truly-deep kiss recently. Not that I'm counting or anything. He moves against my lips, pushing to deepen the already-steamy kiss. Maybe it's just the hormones that urge me on, that keep clinging onto the end of one kiss into the next. I finally get a hold of myself and linger out, breathing heavily against my grip on his jaw which held him in place.

"Y-yeah I'll definitely get that food now, no problem, babe." He stutters, pecking me a little longer again before tugging on his coat. I laugh lightheartedly.

"Oh, and Harry?" I call as he half-opens the door. He peaks his head back in with a upward qwirked eyebrow. "Don't forget the icecream."

"Wouldn't dream of it,"

I blow him a kiss and watch as the door shuts closed.

••A/N

Soooo, first chapter back. Sorry for the break. I've decided on continuing this as a short story, a lot like Rose Petals probably. Hope you like the rest, it'll probably go around 10-15 chapters dependent. Thanksss