Forever and Always (A Harry Styles Fan Fiction)

CHAPTER 12: Then

I heard the faint rumble of the engine and peeked out my window to see the mail truck stop at our mailbox. As soon as the mailman stuck the envelopes in our box and drove away, I hurried out of the house.

This had been my almost daily routine for the past three weeks of February, ever since the last of the college letters started arriving. Call me paranoid, but going to a university was a goal I had been aiming for since elementary school. I had applied to seven colleges and had gotten all but one reply so far. Five of the schools had accepted me, but these were my “safety net” colleges; the other two were what I was betting on the most.

The sixth letter had turned out to be a rejection from Harvard. The news had hit me harder than I thought. I had told myself that I could handle a rejection, but that was before I knew what receiving one felt like. I was in a depression for nearly a week, and even Harry had a difficult time cheering me up. We had gone out on both his birthday and Valentine’s Day, but my preoccupation with college applications had drawn my attention away from practically anything else.

As I walked up to the mailbox, my heart beat more rapidly. Carefully, I reached in and pulled out a stack of letters. I quickly flipped through them.

Junk mail, bills, bills… What if it didn’t come today? I thought, slightly relaxing.

Then I stopped at the last envelope—crisp and white, with the logo of Stanford University proudly displayed in the corner. I couldn’t bring myself to open it right then, not knowing how I would react to what was inside.

In a daze, I walked back into the house and set the other letters on the coffee table. I sat down at the dining table, staring at the envelope in my hands. I was home alone that Saturday afternoon and the silence in the house only made the situation more unnerving.

Relax, Jenny. It’s just a letter.

I took a deep breath and was just about to tear the envelope open when my cell phone rang, jarring me out of my trance. Startled, I fumbled with my phone, finally pulling it from the pocket of my jean shorts and answering the call.

“Harry!” I said, holding my phone in one hand and the letter in the other. He immediately noticed my distressed tone.

“Jenny, what’s wrong?” Harry said apprehensively over the phone.

“The Stanford letter came…” I said, trailing off.

“You haven’t opened it yet, have you?” Harry said knowingly. I shook my head, but realized he couldn’t see me on the phone.

“Nope,” I said, laughing nervously. “Why can’t I just open the letter and be done with it?” I asked, sighing.

“Don’t worry, I’ll be over in a few minutes,” Harry replied, and I heard the ignition of a car engine in the background. “See you soon, babe. Love you.”

I hung up the phone and tossed the letter aside, forcing myself not to look at it. I wasn’t going to open it until I knew that I could handle the response, whether it was positive or negative. I told myself that whatever was in there was not going to determine the rest of my life, but in reality, I knew it would take a long time for me to get over another rejection.

I had always set high goals for myself, and most of the time, that was a good thing. But when I fall, it’s twice as hard to get back up. As Harry had said before, ambition was my fatal flaw. “Don’t be so hard on yourself, Jenny. I’ll help you through this,” he’d say.

The doorbell rang and I quickly picked up the letter from the table before opening the front door. Harry stood outside, a bright smile lighting up his face.