Everything Has Changed

With or Without You

*See the stone set in your eyes
See the thorn twist in your side
I wait for you

Sleight of hand and twist of fate
On a bed of nails she makes me wait
And I wait without you

With or without you
With or without you

The redwood table seems to come to life in the darkness and shadows of the chapel at night. The flashes of headlights dance across the reapers blade making his grin mock Chibs as he sits in his president seat. He's been sitting there for hours trying to figure out how to make everything go back to the way it was before, but he isn't sure exactly which before he means. Before Jax took a hefty prison sentence, or before Jax came back to Charming. Either way the scot wasn't sure things would be better. If he went back to before Jax went to prison he wouldn't hurt so much right now because he would never have known what it felt like to love the same woman as Jax, but if he went back to before Jax came back he didn't know if he would ever have had the courage to tell Tara the truth.

From the moment Jax called him he knew it was going to be a clusterfuck.

"Chibs." He answered his phone.

"You got a minute for a ghost brother?"

Filip smiled and chuckled "Jackie boy, how ya hanging in there brudder?"

"I need your help."

"Aye, what can I do?"

Chibs eyes widened as he listened to Jax. "I don't know Jackie, it's not a good idea to leave your old lady alone." He warned.

"She's doesn't belong to me brother. Not right now."

"Tara will always belong to you Jax. She's yar true north man. She deserves to know your out."

"You know I always appreciate anything you have to say brother, but this time I can't pull her back into my life until I know I can have a life outside of SAMCRO. Can you please just keep my release to yourself? I only called out of respect to you..."

"Jesus Christ Jax ya called cause ya knew I'd hear from the inside."

The silence on the phone made both men unsure of where to go next. They had never been at a loss for word in their friendship until now. The only thing that made the older man agree to keep the secret was because he knew the Jax was going to do what he wanted anyway, and telling the club, or Tara would only hurt and enrage them both respectively. You didn't just walk away from your club and not pay the price, and even though Tara had only just moved back to California from Colorado it would do nothing but hurt her and put her and the kids whole life in chaos... again, if she learned the truth.

Through the storm, we reach the shore
You gave it all, but I want more
And I'm waiting for you

With or without you

With or without you
Ah ha
I can't live with or without you

And you give yourself away
And you give yourself away
And you give
And you give
And you give yourself away

It was unusually dark for a summer evening, and a look at the clock told him it was hours earlier then he thought it was. Since the moment Tara and the boys, and finally Charlie moved into his house he has always wanted to go home. Never once has he stayed out longer then necessary and any glances at crow eaters became nonexistent. He loves walking into his house that was now filled with children arguing, and Tara trying to referee. The sound of his little girls' feet on the hallway carpet as she ran straight into his arms to welcome him home.