there is an irony,
i think to myself
amid one of many
pews in the church
hall of an all - girls
private catholic
academy my high
school is on a visit
t o, i n h a v i n g a
collection of priests
& bishops talk to
a r o o m f u l l o f
teenagers a b o u t
relationships and
sexuality and love
s o m e t h i n g
particularly hellish
a b o u t t h e
arrangement for
both sides ;
something i know
now to refer to as:
" catholic guilt "
the priest tells us
h o w o n e s e x i s
incomplete without
the opposite and the
h a l l e r u p t s i n
stunned silence -
u n s u r e i f h e
understands the
hypocrisy of his
celibacy and such
teachings
when the priest
receives question
on queer identities
and how the church
isolates them - he
responds by talking
about the woes of
an over - sexualised
world - whilst i turn
to my right to one
of my few childhood
friend's ; who is
a s e x u a l a n d
aromantic and in
turn disgusted by
the very idea of
intercourse but will
l i k e l y h a v e s e x
anyway to appease
h e r n i g e r i a n /
christian mother
the priest talks about
maintaining one's
v i r g i n i t y u n t i l
marriage and i think
about my best friend -
who is as catholic as
they c o m e w h i c h
means to say, is pro-
life and feels guilty
even after french
kissing her (atheist)
boyfriend
the priest gives us a
lecture on promiscuity
and the flaws of a
lustful girl. and i look
to one of my friends
who is no longer a
v i r g i n nor is she
r e l i g i o u s b u t is
confident in her
sensuality
the priest says a lot
more that day and
avoids answering
many more questions
most of which, i can't
recall and don't care
to either; after all the
priest is hypocrite, so
is the entirety of the
roman catholic
church with their
holier than thou
superiority complex
which is to say , the
foundation of this
branch of christianity
is a tsunami wave
which is to say, it was
only after purging
myself of this guilt
and taking a step back
from the faith could i
see the cracks in the
floorboard which is to
say, i wish everyone
else could see it, this
crumbling o f a n
ancient c o n c e p t i
wish my closest and
most religious friends
especially would see
it,
rather than feel
themselves become
cloaked by a opaque
shadow of guilt
- and on the off chance i'm wrong. i'll see all you hypocrites/priests in hell.
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the failings of a surgically healed heart | a collection
Poetry「 WATTYS 2019 WINNER 」 the failings of a surgically healed heart, is a series of autobiographical poems arranged into six thematic parts to form a collection which examines the idea of the collective and how that informs individual. i. family an exp...
