Scorpius, Rose, James, Albus, and Lily to Draco
Scorpius: There's nothing rich folks love more
Draco: We're rich.
Scorpius: Than going downtown and slummin' it with the poor. They pull up in their carriages and gawk at the students in the common just to watch them talk.
Draco: Ummm.....?
Scorpius: Take Harry Potter: the man is loaded.
Draco: No he's not.
Scorpius: Uh-oh, but little does he know that his children, James, Albus, Lily, sneak into the Muggle world to see the cute people.
Draco: Why do I need to know this?
Rose: Work, work!
Draco: Work MY what?
James: James!
Rose: Work, work!
Albus: ALBUS!
Draco: WE KNOW YOUR NAMES GET ON WITH IT!
Lily: And Lily.
Draco: We Know.
Rose: Work, work! The Potter siblings!
James: James!
Lily: Lily!
Albus: Albus
Scorpius: Work!
Lily: Daddy said to be home by sundown
Draco: I'm not your father why are you texting me?
James: Daddy doesn't need to know
Draco: Y'all are running away, aren't you?
Lily: Daddy said not to go downtown
Draco: What's downtown? Who's downtown?
Albus: Like I said, you're free to go
Draco: Are you running away from your father?
James: But—look around, look around
Draco: At what?
James: The wizarding war happened at Hogwarts!
Draco: Obviously.
Albus and Lily: Hogwarts!
Draco: WHY REPEAT IT?
Rose: James!
Scorpius, Rose, Albus, James, and Lily: Work!
Draco: Why'd you all have to say it?!
Lily: It's bad enough daddy wants to go to war
Draco: Your dad and I already went to war.
Albus: People shouting in Hogsmeade.
Draco: People shouted at Hogsmeade? Hogsmeade still exists? Hold up.
Lily: It's bad enough there'll be violence on our shore
Draco: You live inland. Nowhere near a coast.
James: New ideas in the air
Draco: I thought my son said you were incredibly stupid.
James and Scorpius: Look around, look around
Draco: At what?
Albus: James, remind me what we're looking for...
Rose, Lily: She's lookin' for me!
Draco: That's disgusting. Aren't y'all related? And isn't Rose Weasel dating my son?
James: Albus, I'm lookin' for a mind at work (Work, work!)
Draco: You don't have a mind at work, James.
James: I'm lookin' for a mind at work! (Work, work!)
Draco: What is this?
James: I'm lookin' for a mind at work! (Work, work!) Whooaaaaa!
Draco: Wtf?!
Albus, James, and Lily: Whooaaaaa Work!
Scorpius: Wooh!
Draco: What now?
Scorpius: There's nothin' like summer in the city
Draco: We don't live in a city.
Scorpius: Someone in a rush next to someone lookin' pretty.
Draco: Are you dating Rose?
Scorpius: Excuse me, miss, I know it's not funny but your perfume smells like your daddy's got money.
Draco: This is your father.
Scorpius: Why you slummin' in the city in your fancy heels
Draco: I only wear heels in private.
Scorpius: You searchin for an urchin who can give you ideals?
Draco: Urchin? You mean like Annie from Annie?
James: Malfoy, you disgust me
Scorpius: Ah, so you've discussed me. I'm a trust fund, baby, you can trust me!
Draco: Trust fund? You're the most irresponsible human being I've ever met.
James: I've been reading Common Sense by Thomas Paine.
Draco: What's that?
James: So men say that I'm intense or I'm insane You want a revolution?
Draco: Nope.
James: I want a revelation So listen to my declaration:
Draco: WHAT TF IS THIS?!
Albus, James, and Lily. We hold these truths to be self-evident that all men are created equal.
Draco: MEN?! Just purebloods.
James: And when I meet Thomas Jefferson
Draco: SOME TERRIBLE MUGGLE!
Scorpius: Unh!
Draco: That terrible moment when you realize your son is stupid.
James: I'm 'a compel him to include women in the sequel!
Draco: JUST PUREBLOODS! Scorpius, why are you so stupid?
Rose: Work!
Draco: WTF MY SON IS POSSESSED!
Draco left to binge eat apples.
Everyone Else: YAY! WE LYRIC PRANKED DRACO MALFOY!
