The Wife of Captain Jack Harkness

Yours Forever

 Returning to those days it seemed inevitable that our time together would come to an end. Jack said he would always be there for me, so I would have to be the one to send him away, only my words could set him free. I was afraid of the finality as I spoke those words, part of me believed I was wrong, but at the same time I was relieved that I was brave enough to take action. It was a perfectly ordinary morning, my husband kissed me chastely on the cheek and then proceeded to dress. I stayed in the bed and watched him intently, twisting the loose wedding ring around my finger. We’d spent another awful night in bed together, lying alongside each other but entirely separate. There was no turning back as I broke the silence.

 “Jack… I cannot go on like this. If I had a child, it would be different. For a long time I’ve desired a family of my own. But it’s my fault, I married you knowing you were different… It frightens me Jack, your immortality but at the same time, you’re a miracle and the man who saved my life…”  

 Jack had his back to me, I could see the tension in his shoulders I thought I heard a sigh, then he turned to face me, utterly composed as though he’d been expecting this moment. Jack smiled kindly but I could see the resignation in his eyes, it was the same sad look he gave me when he knew my brother could not be saved.

 “No Bella, this is all my fault. I should have left you alone, it’s me, it’s always me. Everything I touch…”

 “No Jack, don’t…We love each other but it’s no longer enough.”

 “We love each other too much Bella.”

 “And though it was only these brief years I’m glad you were mine.” I attempted to smile bravely at my husband.

 “I’ll always be yours Bella.” Jack returned the smile.

 By this time I was trembling with so many emotions, my heart and my head pulling me in different directions. I still loved him, I was sending away the man I loved because I could no longer bear to live in his world. Jack ran over to my side of the bed and gathered me up in his arms protectively. We had returned to each other for one last time. We may have been altered by events but we were no longer strangers, we were ourselves again. Jack held me tightly while I wept helplessly in his arms. Then my husband kissed me tenderly on my brow, the ghost of that kiss still lingers with me… Jack left the room and he was gone.

 Jack would look after me financially, I became a widow with immediate effect, these things could be arranged easily by Torchwood. I was afraid of what the future held for me, would I just spend the rest of my days secluded and lonely? It was as though I had never met Jack Harkness, it was like a dream, a fragile and insubstantial one which had now ended. Would it be possible to love again, to have any kind of future? When I finally left the bedroom on that terrible day, I discovered a note that my husband had left for me. I’m holding it in my hands now, it is better preserved than me.

Dear Bella,

Live the life that I can never have.

Be happy for the both of us.

Yours Forever,

Jack Harkness

 “Yours Forever.” I believe he truly meant that sentiment, but a hundred years from now would Jack Harkness even remember me and my brother Fred.