perspective | jjk

11.

"you drink," you breathe out angrily, and shamefully i bow my head.

"i know," i reply, tone doused in sadness, and it doesn't ease your glare. in face it seems to grow worse. even though i've only drank twice.

"it's him," you spit, and i flinch because it isn't really. my actions are my fault. i enjoy being risky, i enjoy doing things girls my age don't think about, but you fail to see that. donghyuck isn't at blame and i struggle to make sense of the situation.

"it's not," i argue back, and your glare, if possible, hardens. i'd normally give up but the taste of donghyuck's name on the tip of my tongue is alcoholic to me, gives me courage to do things i'd never dream of, and i find myself arguing with you in my room as the word passes by without our care. my eyes narrow as they meet yours, i wonder if you'd even manage to say his name.

"you would never think of touching that stuff if it wasn't for him. for god's sake, jaehee! you turn sixteen in a few months! sixteen!" he yells and i jump, because it's true, but that doesn't mean donghyuck is to blame. "just- stop it! stay away from him, i'm warning you!"

"stay away from him? he's my boyfriend," i cry out and you jump, flinch at the words, growl.

"you don't need a boyfriend! you're too young!"

"i'm almost sixteen! stop treating me like a child, jeongguk!"

"i'm not-"

"you are!" i snap and i see you shiver. i don't care, i just want donghyuck, not jeongguk. "i don't know what it is about you but you've changed. and i hate that."

it's foolish how i lie so easily to your face. i love you.