Speak To a Girl

Chapter 14

Faith POV: 

Present

I sit in my room, looking at the ground, before leaning my head back against the wall. I knew Mack would probably call Tim to say goodbye, but I never expected him to come so soon. I stand up slowly, and force myself to come out of my room, before hearing Tim and Mack talk from the top of the stairs. 

"I needed her... After the accident... I woke up, thinking she'd be by my side, and then she just took off..." I hear Tim let out, making me cringe. He doesn't understand... and he won't. I pretty much ran away, without really explaining myself, which I understand is pretty crappy toward him, but... I needed time. 

I disappeared for about a year, during that time, I had Jana. I spent about three months with her, before I realized I just simply wasn't fit for being a parent... not yet at least. I came back and talked to Kim and Mack about what to do, and he said they could adopt her as their own until I was ready. They've taken care of her since. A few months after that, I decided to reach out to Tim again, and we stayed together for a year before his suicide attempt, which pretty much concluded things for us. He went back to rehab for his injuries, and I moved to Nashville to try and move on. Tim moved to Nashville later, in hopes he could see me, but we never really saw each other until today. 

"I remember sitting in the goddamn rehab center thinking that I had made the biggest mistake... and that I should've just let go... because I had no one... And I remember the pain just being so unbelievable, and I kept telling myself that if I could have her, it'd be worth it. But I couldn't have her... And that..." He runs on, making me feel suffocated. 

"It hurt." Mack finishes for him. "I know. I could tell." Mack adds, before sighing. "I thought when she came back, that things would work out. But I didn't know how low a place you were at." Mack continues, making me wince. I breathe slowly trying to withhold any emotion. 

"Things are better, though." Tim releases, although not reassuringly. 

"You miss her?" Mack asks. I freeze, wanting to hear the answer. 

"No... That chapter is over." Tim lets out, crushing me a bit. "I can't keep reaching out to a brick wall... I just... I can't keep doing the same thing over and over again and expecting her to change." He says, shattering me. 

"I understand." Mack lets out softly. He says something else, but it's inaudible. I slide down against the wall and cover my mouth as tears flood down my cheeks. I'm too busy wallowing to even realize the footsteps coming up the stairs. I jump as I see a tall figure standing beside me very suddenly. Mack looks down at me, as I look up at him with tears rushing down. He takes my hand, pulling me onto my feet, before wrapping his arms around me tightly. I press my face against his shoulder and begin to sob. He places his hand on the back of my head, slowly running his fingers through my hair. "It's okay, darlin'." He reassures me. 

"Hey Mack!" Tim shouts up the stairs, making me jump. I hold onto Mack, trying my best to muffle my cries. "You got a notepad around here?" He asks. 

"Yeah! In my room." He says. He panics as he hears Tim begin to walk upstairs. He motions me to go, so I rush to the end  of the hall, hiding behind a little owl-cove at the end of the hall by my door, placing my hand over my chest. Everything hurts, and I don't understand why. Yes, I cared and I loved him, but I never pictured myself being this torn up. 

"Which way is your room?" Tim asks Mack. Mack clears his throat, taking a deep breath. 

"Right here." He says, motioning toward the door on the other side of the stairs. Tim doesn't  make a sound, or even move, which catches me off guard. I hear the floorboard creak, as if he were finally moving, but then I hear Mack's voice. "Don't..." He warns quietly. I turn my head to see there's a mirror on the closet door across the hall from me. Tim stares at me in it, while I stare back, Mack's hand on his chest to keep him from coming toward me. I watch him for a few more seconds, before diving into my room and slamming the door.