Novel Jumper

Chapter Nineteen

 "I have decided to start with the truth telling," Connor declared seriously. Lilia nodded, almost fearing what he had to say. After all, where she came from, telling the truth was rarely a good thing.

"Let's start with Theresa," Connor said, his voice quiet. Lilia's heart dropped.

It was unlikely that he would start with you, Lilia.

I guess your odds aren't great, even in the Wizard of Improbability's territory.

"Theresa was a great friend. But I always knew she was...attracted to me. And sure, she was pretty and fierce and interesting - but she just wasn't for me. And yet, as the months passed, I kept thinking, maybe. Maybe I could work around it and find a way to love her. I didn't want to hurt her or end our friendship. It was too valuable to me. I made an effort, I really did. I just couldn't love her. Not like that.

"Then she died. Wow, that was hard. It's still hard. I still feel this...this pain. She was my best friend, after all. I felt like I should have explained to her that her feelings for me weren't mutual, but then I felt like, well, at least she died thinking that she had found love. But then I would go right back with, but didn't she deserve the truth? Around and around I go. But I think I did the right thing. I think. I think about it a lot.

"Then there's you, Lilia. And you messed up everything."

Lilia felt the words drive into her heart like shards of glass. "I know," she murmured. "I'm sorry."

"You waltz - okay, more like fall - in here, gorgeous and utterly shellshocked - "

Wait.

What?

Lilia's eyes widened and she could only stare at Connor as he plowed onward.

"And I just - everything in me was like, 'Don't let this girl get away.' Because, see, Theresa was one chapter of my life. You're the next chapter, and I was thinking - I hoped that maybe you could be the next and the next and the next."

Lilia could barely breathe. She couldn't believe the words that were coming out of Connor's mouth. Had he truly felt this way about her from the beginning? Or was it something about the improbable magic of the world around them making him say these things?

"And yet you were always going to go home. I tried to accept that, to help you, for so long. I couldn't - I can't - just keep ignoring my feelings, though. I felt awful when I woke up in the mining community and found how I had positioned myself when I slept, because that just made me want you to stay even more. And I just - gods." Connor let out a breath. His eyes drifted down to Lilia's lips. "I just want to kiss you."

Lilia took a deep breath and said the most unlikely thing she could have ever imagined herself saying.

"Why don't you?"

Connor grinned, a smile of pure happiness, and then his lips met hers.

Lilia's arms raised instinctively and wrapped around his neck, pulling him closer. The kiss was gentle, lingering. Slowly, it evolved into something more. Connor pressed her against the wall, kissing her hungrily. She sighed against his lips. He groaned slightly in the back of his throat, running his hands through her hair. She shivered at the stimulation and pressed herself closer to him. His lips were warm and soft on hers.

She had no idea how long they stood, her pressed against the wall and him pressed against her. Finally, however, they broke away. She wasn't sure who had moved back first, or whether it had been a subconscious, mutual decision. Connor rested his forehead on hers. They both were breathing heavily.