Black Belle #Wattys2020

Chapter 8

*this is complicated*

* Ivy P.O.V.*

I was standing in front of my mirror looking at my reflection. It was my first day of college. I wanted to look decent. I was wearing my black skinny jeans and a white tshirt. I was never the type of girl to dress good. My main priority was 'let's pass this day without a catastrophe' but that doesn't mean I was non fun. Or at least I think I am not.

My phone rang. Alarming me that Ben is here. So I quickly took my bag and said goodbye to my grandparents and went away. I quickly sit in the passenger's seat

"Ohh, someone is trying to look good" he said smirking

"First impressions are always important" I returned with a smile as he drove off.

"Even Jean won't look that good" I bit the inside of my cheek as I thought about her

"You know, I think that things are ..... not fine with you both"

"Believe me I know. And if it wasn't for my love to her I would have broke up with her a long time ago" he said shaking his head

"Your love? Ben you are my friend but I don't see love at all, I just see lust"

"Of course you will say that, you are her best friend, did she tell you to say this?" He said a little louder as he tightened his hands

"No, look if I was ever your girlfriend and you took me on a date, while we were talking I told you 'see there is a hot guy behind you' how would you react?"

"I wouldn't say, I would just leave you"

"See, that's what you do, and don't dare deny it!"

"I don't want to be in a relationship at all" he whispered sadly "but I can't leave her because one I care for her as a friend and she would cry, and two this means losing you and Pablo,  I know this sounds so selfish but ....."

"Hey it's okay, I won't ever leave you, I  didn't want to tell Jean that her relationship is toxic because I was also afraid you wouldn't talk to me ever again, but this means that both you and me are the bad people here. I am an unfaithful friend for not advising her and you are a bad boyfriend for keeping her hurt. Sooner or later you two will break up, but what it matters is how deep will it hurt. The longer you keep hurting her the deeper it will hurt"

"Let me think about it" he replied as he pulled in front of Jean's house.

We waited for her a few minutes before she opened the door shouting at her mom who looks like she wants to cry. They look like they were fighting over something

Something? Or someone? 

Jean shut the door in her mother's face and went to us. She sat in the back and smiled as her eyes fell on Ben. He smiled back and started driving. No one dared to say anything.

Maybe I shouldn't have said that. She looks happy with him now, what should I do? This is complicated. One moment I am telling Ben to leave and the second I want them to stay.

As we approach the college, we noticed Pablo waiting for us, he started waving for us. I smiled as I knew he would break the awkward silence among us.