nurse; mgc

fifty-seven

i was listening to lostmyhead while writing this and i was on the verge of tears bsbshsjamah i'll link it up here if you wanna listen while reading.
just play it on a loop lmao

Jasmine's POV

"Are you ready?" Calum peered around, tightening the gold cuffs on his wrists. I was looking into the mirror. As usual, staring deeply at my stomach— scared, disgusted, anxious.

I have to figure out what I'm going to do before I can't do anything. If I'm really going to abort this baby, I won't have too long before I run out of time.

"Are you okay?" Calum asked, placing a friendly hand on my shoulder and I shook my head, turning to face him. I felt tears well in my eyes and my throat form a tight knot, making it near to impossible to release any sounds. "Calum," i croaked and he hummed, "I'm pregnant."

Admitting it to Calum was almost like admitting it to myself. A little part of me still felt like there was nothing to be worried about. But, there was life inside of me.

Calum just engulfed me into a big hug. I could feel his loss of words. He wrapped his arms around my shoulders, as mine were around his waist. His chin was just on the top of my head, playing with my short natural curls, when he asked me, "are you scared? You know, of what happens if he gets convicted."

"Yes." I scoffed, only squeezing calum tighter. "I haven't even told him yet."

"Are you gonna keep it?" He asked and I just glanced at the floor. I felt tears pricking my eyes, a terrible feeling that never seemed to have gone away the last few weeks. Our eyes met again and I whispered. "It wouldn't feel right..... to kill it."

•••

Calum, Ashton, daddy, auntie, and I made our way to the court hearing. The room was hot and stuffy, you could see the little dust specks floating around as the 4 pm sunlight shot through the room.

Michael's lawyer was at one podium, and Xavier's was at another. Xavier was pronounced dead, the day Michael got arrested.

I looked to my left to see Xavier's whole family, dressed in black. His mom was in the front trying to hold back her sobs, as she cried into the balled up tissue in her hand. Her mascara was streaming down her plump brown face, his brothers and sisters were ccomforting her but nothing was stopping her cries.

I felt a knot tie tighter and tighter in the core of my gut, I knew any second Michael would walk in. "Witnesses, and speakers please approach" the guard called, Calum and I walked towards the small gate, and entered the court area. We both sat down, and Xavier's mom and brother also sat.

My foot was shaking anxiously, rocking up and down. I rubbed the tips of my fingers against eachother, feeling like I was gonna puke I stared at the judge's gavel that rested on the little wooden coaster.

Calum rubbed my knee, passing me a pack of mint gum. I popped two of the white flavoured mints into my mouth. In the corner of my eye I saw the door began to creek open, immediately my head shot to the source. I saw Michael, his face scuffed up, his eyes purple and black, and his arms covered in bruises. He was in handcuffs, and the short sleeved orange jumpsuit.

Immediately, tears began to prick at my eyes as he walked up to the podium. I waved at him, mouthing an I love you.

I haven't seen Michael since the graduation last week. "All rise!"
The guard called, everyone stood at the presence of the judge entering the room. She sat down and gestured for us to sit down, and that's what we did.