Marionette (A 'The 5th Wave' Fanfiction) [COMPLETED] #wattys2017

32. Killer; Chapter II.

    Now, I won't say I never imagined what it would be like kissing Ben. It would be an obvious lie. I always pictured a gentle embrace, soft lips and feathery touches.

    Reality is the exact opposite of that.

    Ben holds me to himself forcefully and his lips work against mine in rage, as if daring me to pull away. We both know I wouldn't do that.

    By the time he breaks the kiss I am struggling for air. His breathing is heavy also. He balls my hair into his fist tightly (but not to hurt me) and keeps my face close to his. Our foreheads are nearly touching.

    Sweat rolls down my forehead. "Asshole," I mutter.

    At that Ben smiles and pecks the corner of my lips. "You love me."

    I swallow through my dry throat. "I--I--"

    Ben chuckles and cups my face in his hands. I bite the inside of my gum nervously. Ben's lips gently touch my own. "I love you."

    Not the first time he said that, I know, but still. Now it's different, though. Last time he said those words was in his raging outburst.

    I smile at him and by the collar of his jacket pull him closer.

×××

    We stay sitting together in an abandoned watchtower. It all has this adrenaline to it. If we are found we will both lose points for our squads. That will mean he won't graduate.

    Despite this, Ben refuses to let me go. Of course if I wanted to go I would have. I don't. Neither does Ben.

    We scoot closer together as a patrolling plane passes above us. I remember the drawing I found in Xander's bed. The paper planes.

    My somewhat romantic mood passes instantly. "Ben . . ." I begin.

    He looks at me and brushes a strand of hair from my face. "Hmm?"

    I tell him about Xander-- Slingshot. Careful not to leave out a detail. All from the note to the bathroom. "So . . . I was thinking about that lately. It makes no sence. What do you make of it?" I finish.

    Ben is looking at me uneasily. Worry for me is marked all over him. "You shouldn't stress much about things you can't change." Both of us know that's the only thing I've been doing lately. "You really could use a goodnight's sleep. And maybe--"

    "Ben," I interrupt his blubbering. "What are you thinking?"

    "It's . . . I don't want to scare you or anything . . ." I do my best to give him all the time he might need, though I would be lying if I said I was patient. "Slingshot's death . . . doesn't sound like suicide."

    I feel like the world's biggest idiot. How come I didn't see it before? Camp made me so dumb. Ben was correct. Absolutely correct. All the signs point to it. And maybe even the slightly broken door wasn't Mononoke's doing. What if Sling was trapped in thr bathroom? Someone broke in and . . . killed him? It would nake sence. But who would do such a thing?

    With a shock I remember Flintstone missing at the breakfast table that morning. Flintstone always hated me. He would do anything to get rid of me. Everyone knows of the conflict in Squad 22. Would he misuse it? Would he kill Slingshot?

    A voice in my head instantly says yes. He's crazy. But I can't believe he would do that. That anyone could do that.

    Yet someone did. And I'm going to find out who. And kill them.

    "Rose," Ben says desperately. I realize I must have zoned out.

    I smile at him gently. "I'm okay."

    He doesn't trust me. But lets it be. He wraps his arms around me. "You're safe," he whispers and I wish he was right.

    I bet two things don't seem clear at the moment. Firstly, how the hell am I okay with this? We're both young and naïve, right?

    No. In a world like this, many things are intensified-- dangers, fears, but also when you find a true friend, trust, reliance and love. Nobody cares how old you are. We are mature over our ages. We're not kids anymore.

    Second, I never told Ben I love him. I do-- I'm just saving it for later.

    If he doesn't think he has my love, he can't take it with him. That means he has to come back for it. And I'm making sure he comes back. This is just the most efficient way how to do it.

    "Marionette! Where the hell are you?!" Mononoke's voice rings.

    It must be nine already. Can't let Reznik know I was up here. I stand but Ben pulls me back down. "Farewell, Rose," he says seriously.

    I quickly kiss him one last time before joining Mononoke and expertly dodging all her questions.

    For the first time in weeks I sleep peacefully.