Sugar (ON HOLD)

Chapter Seven

~ Sugar ~

It was a beautiful Thursday morning and instead of going to our lectures, Miranda and I decided to skip and spend the day shopping. I had $2 000 to blow and insisted on treating us both to a nice lunch. As she was never one to turn down anything free, she had accepted.

The whole week had been more or less hectic; it was coming to the end of January which meant March wasn't very far away, and I had a huge English Literature project due in at the beginning of it. I was stressing over it as I had no idea where to start. My assignment was to do a 6 000 word essay comparing narrative gaps, and arguing why the books I chose should be part of the literary canon.

It was difficult and would need my undivided attention, but after almost a week of getting nowhere I decided to have a break and go out with Miranda. Miranda herself was also struggling at the moment as she was starting a three month internship for a big economic firm and she was finding it really hard to adjust. She was one of the only female minorities in the firm and she felt like she wasn't being taken seriously, which frustrated her to no end because she was much more than a pretty face.

"What's with the frowning face?" Miranda asked, nudging me playfully as we walked out of the Ted Baker store with matching sparkly silver pumps.

"Just thinking, is the internship getting any better?"

"Barely. I'm finding it really hard to find my place, you know? The company is only made up of 17% women and they're all white apart from the Hispanic receptionist. The men are absolute pigs and don't take anything I say seriously at all; it's like they can't fathom the thought of me having anything worthwhile to say. I'm thinking of quitting," Miranda admitted, chewing her lip anxiously.

"I'm really sorry it's not going as you hoped. Maybe you should take it up with Human Resources," I suggested, pushing open the door to DKNY.

"Yeah, that's what Mike said," she nodded before ambling off to the bag section.

I browsed around and decided to pick up a cute purse for my mom and a DKNY custom-made golf club for my dad. Then we decided to head down to a restaurant. It was incredibly fancy and I felt slightly out of place in my P!NK tracksuit and sneakers but I shrugged it off, telling myself I had as much right to be here as anyone else.

"What can I get you ladies?" asked the waitress beaming.

"I'll have a large iced tea with some prawn toast with soy sauce and a small garden salad," ordered Miranda without looking up from her phone.

She had always been an healthy eater preferring to have three small portions of food a day and swore off fizzy drinks, although if she did fancy a snack she would have it. That was probably why she had an amazing figure; a flat toned stomach and long legs.

I was never particularly a healthy eater. I ate whatever I wanted in moderation and tried to drink as much water as I could. I had always been small and slim but I wish I was slightly more toned . But just like every girl, I would get my bout of self-consciousness even though I tried to stay body positive.

"I'll have a glass of iced water with steak and chips please," I ordered, handing the waitress my menu.

"Of course. I'll be back out with your drinks in a few minutes ladies," nodded the waitress before rushing away.

"She was super cheerful," I noted with a snort, watching her go into the kitchen.

"Probably got laid last night," Miranda teased, wiggling her brows playfully.

Rolling my eyes, I asked, "How are things with you, Mike and Max?"

"I do like Max, he's really lovely, but I think I'm going to cut things off with him soon. I like Mike a lot more," she admitted, avoiding my eyes.

"So what if you like Mike more? You still get on with Max so what's the big deal?" I shot back, my brow raised suspiciously.

Miranda had always liked Mike slightly more than she liked Max. It was natural, especially since she had known Mike longer. Mike was her first real sugar relationship; he had taught her things and always treated her with respect and kindness... although lately they hadn't been seeing each other a lot.

Of course it was understandable. His son was incredibly sick and that was Mike's first priority, but his operation had gone well and he had seen Miranda every weekend since then. I hadn't met him personally but he seemed liked a good guy. He was a divorced doctor and always made sure Miranda never went without.

But even saying all of that, she still got along with Max so what has suddenly changed? The only thing I could think of was that she was catching feelings for Mike, but surely that couldn't be true. Especially since she had drummed it into my head that feelings and sugaring didn't go hand in hand.

But one look at her flushed cheeks and guilty look was all I needed for my answer.

"You like him," I stated with a sigh.

"Worse: I love him," she confessed, chewing her lips anxiously.

I remained silent as the waitress served us our food and drinks, but as soon as she left I rounded on Miranda and told her exactly what I thought

"... And at the end of the day, you're just going to get hurt. You were the one that told me falling in love was stupid, that these guys only wanted a pretty thing on their arm and company and nothing more. You said if they wanted a relationship they would be with someone their own age," I finished off with a slight scowl.

"Yes. I know, Lilac! I know it's fucking stupid and I'm bound to get hurt but what else can I do? I can't help how I feel!" She exclaimed, roughly ripping off a piece of her prawn toast and shoving it in her mouth.

"And you're sure it's love?" I asked skeptically.

"Every time I've seen Max, I couldn't sleep with him because I couldn't help but think about Mike. The feeling I get in his presence is indescribable. I get butterflies and my heart starts racing. But can we please change the subject? How are you and James? When are you going out next?"

"Sunday, he's taking me to a hotel " I admitted with a slight blush .

"A hotel?! Do you think you guys will have sex?"

"I mean, I don't think we will if I don't want to, but I honestly don't mind. James is a great guy," I replied, refusing to meet her eyes.

I was never one to discuss sex and my personal life, although it was probably due to the fact that nobody had really asked me before. I didn't feel uncomfortable talking about it, but it was new and I wasn't sure how to say what I wanted to.

"I know you haven't had sex since Calvin. Are you nervous about it?" asked Miranda in a surprisingly gentle tone.

"Part of me is. Calvin and I were in love so everything we did was special and filled with love. It had so much meaning, but with James I'm scared it will feel rushed and tainted. I'm attracted to him and I want to, but I want it to be something I enjoy," I explained.

"I understand what you mean and that's exactly why it's important to only sleep with someone you actually like. James seems lovely and I'm sure if you explain to him, he'll make it enjoyable. Warning though: these men are coming to you to get what they can't get from their wives so don't be boring."

"Well what kind of things do you do?" I asked with a frown.

"Foreplay is essential, I love it and if he's pleasuring you then it's really good for his ego. Moan, make noise and tell him what you like. Practise sucking dick too, nobody likes a one-inch-chick."

Throwing my head back and laughing, I asked how exactly I could practise.

"Easy, with a banana! I do it all the time. When we get home I can teach you. Trust me, my technique is impeccable," Miranda grinned.

"Are you being serious?"

"As HIV."

"Can you take it all the way down?" I asked in a whisper.

"Almost, but Mike is pretty big. He's almost eight inch but he loves when I play with his balls. It drives him crazy. I'll teach you when we get back."

Shaking my head, I finished up my food and called the waitress, looks like I was about to practise my oral skills...