Finally [Johnlock]

Sherlock's Story

"I guess I'll start." Sherlock said, diving into his story.

I knew that I was different. I mean, I'm a high functioning sociopath, that's pretty different. I also knew that I was also into boys just as much as girls. To me, it didn't matter who you liked, as long as they were decent people.

"So I'm a decent person?" John asked, smirking.

"More than decent, in fact. Now shut up and let me finish." Sherlock said, continuing.

I spent a lot of time lonely. Nobody wanted to be with me, as you have noticed I am a little hard to be around. I was lonely for my entire life.

I had some bad days, bad experiences, which I really don't want to get into. Possibly later.

"What type of bad stuff?" John asked.

"Stuff that I don't want to get into." Sherlock said.

Anyways, I got into drugs as a way of distracting myself from all this pain. Soon Lestrade found me and asked me to solve a case for them one time when I was clean. I did, and realized I could get off on that too.

I threw myself into solving cases rather than drugs. Then Lestrade ran out of cases for me to solve. So then I went back into drugs.

Lestrade found me high one day and took me into rehab so that I could continue to solve cases for the Yard. When got out of rehab, I needed a flat mate. Hence, Mike Stamford and you.

I knew I liked you since the moment you moved into the flat with me. I always had a lot of fun with you, constantly wanting to be with you. You weren't gay, so I didn't ever act on my feelings. I respected you as much as possible.

I slowly fell more in love with you every time I was with you. And considering you lived with me, it was a lot.

On the day of my faked death, I had to jump off that building or you would die. Moriarty had three gunmen, prepared to kill you, Mrs Hudson, and Lestrade if I didn't jump off that building. So I did. I had to do it.

It was so difficult, staying away for two years. I watched you, made sure you were doing okay, but not being able to tell you that I was still alive was one of the most difficult things I ever had to do. I thought that coming back would be the easiest part, the best part of my life.

You physically and emotionally attacked me. I expected you to be happy, and you weren't. But you were with Mary. So I stayed quiet and let you have your happiness with Mary.

Watching you and Mary get married was literally the hardest thing of my life. I loved you, John, so I gave up everything to make you happy. I gave up my own heart to make you happy. I made sure you had he best possible wedding with Mary, even though I did have to solve a murder during my speech. Sorry for that, by the way.

And then so much happened with Mary, but you chose to keep loving her. I had to respect that. I loved you so much, John, that I took a metaphorical and literal bullet for you. But then Mary also took a bullet for me.

Seeing you in so much pain, I didn't know what to do. I didn't know how to cope with you in so much pain. So I resorted back to drugs. I'm not used to people caring about me so much.

When we were with Eurus, and your life was in danger in the well, I was more scared than I had ever been in my entire life. If I didn't solve the cases correctly, you would die like the way my other best friend did. I was so scared of losing you my entire life. These past five years have been difficult, without Mary, but I think now it's all made up for.

I love you, John. I always have, even when it hurts me. I always will love you.

John listened in silence. When Sherlock was done, he swore he saw tears in John's eyes.

--
That was an interesting chapter to write. But I loved it. I really really loved writing it.

Have any of you guys seen The Imitation Game? It's freaking amazing!!!!!! It made me cry 3 times and I usually don't cry at movies. It's on Netflix. All y'all should watch it!!!!!

I just rewatched The Reichenbach Fall and the feels!!!!! OML THE FEELS!!!

Later! -Dillon