Toru
"Where's Cassie?" I asked. These past few days she's been mostly late for work. Sometimes she doesn't show up all day at all. Mel told us she was having a hard time sleeping at night so she lets her sleep in during the day. At times she doesn't feel so well that we that we told her to take the day off so she won't get worse.
"Good morning," Cassie said weakly coming into the room. Her hair was tied into a ponytail, which was a rare sight. I tried to look her in the eye but she was looking down. I can see the layer of dark circles forming under her eyes. She quietly sat on her desk and powered up her computer.
"Is she okay?" I whispered to Mel who was equally observing her. Cassie moves like a zombie from The Walking Dead.
Mel shrugged. "She barely touches her stash on the fridge. I have to force her to have a few spoonful every time I eat with her."
So she wasn't eating, I thought. No wonder she's too thin. Her cheeks, which was her most distinctive feature, is now gone. Does she have an eating disorder? I can't help but wonder.
"Does she have anorexia?" I asked Mel. I knew that was a bit invasive but how would I be able to help her if I don't know what's wrong with her.
"Of course not!" Mel said and gave me a sharp look. I guess it was wrong to falsely accuse someone of being sick of something she wasn't.
"Sorry," I mouthed and went back to watching Cassie. She kept yawning every now and then.
"It's probably insomnia," Mel said. "She was asking me a few days ago where she could get some sleeping pills."
"Toru!!!" Tomoya said bounding into the room. Cassie gave a sudden jolt as if surprised by the sudden noise. I frowned at Tomoya and gave him a hushed signal.
"We're starting," he whispered, looking confused.
"Please keep an eye on her," I told Mel.
She looked like she was going to say something but she just nodded so I followed Tomoya to practice.
~~~
"Toru, are you okay?" Taka asked after our set. He didn't sound angry, though.
I shook my head.
"You seem distracted," he said.
"I'm sorry. I was just thinking of something," I said. "Do you mind if we take a break?"
Taka nodded so I went to the kitchen to make a cup of coffee. But that would just make me more jittery. Screw it, I'll take a smoke instead. As I opened the door, I saw Cassie was inside. She swallowed a few multi-colored capsules and drank a glass of water. She saw me but she didn't look guilty so I think she wasn't drinking something she shouldn't. I opened the cupboard and took a pack of cigarettes and some menthol.
"Smoking?" she asked in a monotone, looking at the pack in my hands.
I nodded. I was thinking maybe she's going to lecture me about how it ruins my health and second hand smoke and all that shit.
"Can I join you?" she asked and I was genuinely surprised. She didn't look like she smokes. Maybe she wanted to try.
"Sure?" I said hesitantly. I went to the smoking area and she silently followed me.
Why am I feeling guilty about this? I asked myself as I handed her a stick. Like I'm selling contrabands to high school student. She's twenty-one years old for god's sake.
I watched her as she puffs out the smoke. To be honest, I was expecting her to choke, like first timers do. She didn't. I realized it wasn't her first time doing this.
