you strip me of my dignity, tear me apart with your fucking talons, suck the life out of me and watch my pious tears fall down my burdensome, sallow face
I cry I cry I cry
always so dreadfully tired
tired of being tired, twenty four hours a day seven days a week. doing nothing but staring at the cobwebs in the corners of my room, the walls are caving in and I drown in the melancholic sea
you abuse me you abuse me you abuse me
you can't do this to me, you can't be overbearingly amorous you can't be controlling you can't be scathingly cruel to me all in a span of a few minutes
I cannot keep up I cannot keep up!
my aching limbs move slower than molasses on most days but I jump like a antelope hiding from a mighty lion whenever I hear the quivering anger in your voice rising higher than the tide of the Red Sea
I can't rewire my brain I cannot wring out the horrid memories of us battling to yell over the other's raging screams
the daydreams sailing away in the clouds projected onto my grimy window are not enough to hold me over, the nasty feeling in my chest prevails and I am still left with a dull craving for the unconditional love and care I was robbed of
I'm the red bulging blemish on this family's debilitating visage
you despise me you regret ever having me
I know it.
I see it whenever you stick the dagger deeper and deeper into my chest, like a renaissance painting we are stuck in this scene of mortal anguish, our faces remain in expressions of woe and the flock of people behind us perpetually in mass hysteria
our cursed state is far from a masterpiece
I will not surrender to the afflictions you lash upon me, you are absolute poison and thus,
I will set fire to this realm
and let the twisted bloodline die out in glorious fatality
-
hello just a reminder that if anyone in your family or friend group has ever made you feel like a burden - you did not deserve to be treated that way and whatever they said is Not True. and if anyone's ever made you feel foolish for showing emotion, they are in the wrong. you deserve to let yourself feel. also, I am proud of you for any little victory you've had today. stay safe
