it was him ; g.d

09.16.16

Flash back
_
"graysonnn, come on," i said happily
pulling him through the carnival.

lately, as in the last few months.
he's never happy or adventurous like usual. and i feel terrible because he is my bestfriend.

suddenly, we came to a hault.
because grayson stopped walking.

"you know, i would never cause you any harm or hurt you in any way on purpose. right ?" he asked holding both of my cheeks in his hands.

"yes silly. and you know i love you right?" i said playfully.

"no lauren. im serious, you're the most important person in my life. and id never want to hurt you." he said still having his hands on my face.

"yes i know." i whispered back.

and with that we continued walking around the carnival.
_________

we made it back to his car heading home.
checking my phone, september16 , 2016 12:01 am read across the top of my rose gold iphone 6s.

the car ride home was silent. with only the radio playing an ed sheeran song.

__

as grayson pulled in my driveway, i turned to to look at him. guilt feeling his eyes.

"hey are you okay?" i asked him looking into his eyes.

"goodnight i love you laur," he said leaning over kissing my cheek.

"i love you," i said closing the car door.

little did i know that was the last thing i ever said to grayson dolan.

_______

later that night around 4:30am i was woken up by my phone ringing.
"ethan dolan"
grayson's brother.

answering and hearing him telling me to make it over there as soon as possible i was out my door and in my car.

__

"lauren, its grayson," ethan said fully sobbing.

there was an ambulance and three cop cars.

oh god no.

running past them up the stairs and into gray's room.

i saw something i never wanted to see.

blood on the wall.

gun on the floor.

and two men now loading my dead bestfriend on to a gurney.

Authors note.
Remember this is just a book.
Suicide is not okay!
It's a permanent way of ending a temporary problem. 
I'm always here.
Message me.
I will care and listen.
You're not alone.
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Xoxo jas❤️