Loud And Clear (boyxboy)

Peace Through Understanding

Lucas stared at William's front door for a full five minutes. In the end, he was too afraid to knock it.

He didn't want to force a confrontation. He just wanted to know why.

Eventually, he sat down on the curb across the street and sent a text message.

To William:
I'm outside your door.

He hoped that William would come outside, but at least this way it was in William's hands. If he didn't want to see Lucas, he didn't have to.

The minutes dragged on and Lucas' gaze fell to the cracked cement under his shoes.

Despair built in him again, the same way it had all night. He could feel the pressure in his chest, up his throat, pushing behind his eyes... any moment now he knew there would be tears, but he swallowed and held them in and continued to wait.

Just a few more minutes, and then he would go. Just a few more minutes, and then it would all be over.

"Lucas."

Lucas looked up from his scuffed shoes with a gasp.

He hadn't expected William to come. He had thought the other boy was so over him that he wouldn't even bother. Yet here William was, standing before Lucas with his hands in his pocket and his head bowed and looking so goddamn beautiful that Lucas' heart started pounding.

"Why didn't you tell me you were back?"

It wasn't what he'd intend to ask, but it would do just as well as any other question.

William blinked and finally looked away.

"I wanted to surprise you."

His voice. Lucas had missed his soft, smooth voice so fucking much.

He took a shuddering breath and William sat down on the curb next to him.

Lucas wanted to touch him. His fingers twitched toward the blond but he knew it wasn't what William wanted anymore.

"Why didn't you?" he asked, finally finding his voice. "How did you go from wanting to surprise me, to not even wanting to speak to me so fast?"

William's lips pressed into a thin line and he didn't speak for a moment.

Sitting so close to each other in the sun, William next to him... It felt like the early days again, just them in their clearing.

"I did try," William finally said. "I came to help you babysit."

Lucas frowned.

"You didn't."

"I did. I was there."

"I think I would have seen you there," Lucas huffed.

"Well I saw you," William snapped. And it was so unlike him that Lucas fell silent, staring as William's cheeks turned blotchy with anger.

"I saw you with that guy, the one who treats you like crap, by the way."

William took a shaky breath and looked away.

"Rolling around on the couch and playing with the kids and--and doing everything we did on our first date."

Lucas blinked. And then he blinked again.

"You thought that was our first date?"

William flushed even redder and then jumped to his feet.

Lucas managed to catch him by the arm half way across the street.

"That's not what I meant. I didn't think of anything as dates because I didn't get that you liked me back then."