His Boxy Smiles

Chapter 56

Sweaty palms, teary (and swollen) eyes and pounding in their chest- that was how they found themselves outside of Taehyung's room. Just thinking of opening the door that had been closed to them for days was somewhat nauseating.

They've been wanting to see Taehyung, haven't they? Even after the notebook, they had a week to prepare themselves, think of ways to help Taehyung and heck they just had a group discussion and break down the other night but...

Standing there, rooted to their spot, reminded them of the time when the doctor first allowed them to see Taehyung up close after his surgery. The boy was in a coma then and it seemed so long ago but really, it had only been slightly more than a month, and they could vividly remember how they had strongly refused to enter the room in fear that they'd hurt Tae in any way. Right then, they found themselves in the same situation. Would they make Taehyung worse? Would he be happy to see them? Would he even want to see them?

Of course he'd be glad to see them! That was not even a question they should have doubts about! What was Hoseok thinking?! What were they thinking? The notebook that they received was enough of an indication that Taehyung had willingly reached out. He wanted their help, their comfort, whatever they could do for him.

But... Hoseok gulped. He couldn't help it. It was human nature to question certain things even when there's evidence.

Anxious, he started chewing on his lips, heart thumping faster and faster the longer he stood there staring at the door, waiting for some miracle to happen like maybe open by yourself, door- then maybe someone can push me inside... And he knew, immediately, that the moment he started internally talking to a door (of all things), he was seriously helpless.

"I can't do this," he mumbled to himself, scowling.

Suddenly, somebody placed their hand on his shoulder with a reassuring squeeze. He looked to his side and found that it was Namjoon. It comforted him but at the same time, made the churning in his stomach worse. He was reminded of how wrecked Namjoon had looked just the other day because of the thoughtless words he had let escape his damned mouth. The guilt was unreal, raw and merciless that it made him feel sick. Even until that moment, he had no idea how his leader could just forgive him, them, so easily.

The leader offered him a small smile which he returned.

"It's okay," Namjoon spoke, loud and clear. "Everything will be alright."

And they believed him, once again struck with so much respect for the other. Despite looking like he, himself, was about to burst in anxiety, he still looked dependable and Hoseok could clearly see the fire burning in his eyes, ready to take on the world should it be deemed necessary. He was blessed to have a leader like him. They all were.

Hoseok closed his eyes and took a deep breath. He tried to push all the worries away and focused on the sole person who needed saving behind that closed door. There was no time to think about how much he screwed up just two nights ago, or how much he had hurt a fellow member. Their priority was Taehyung, the innocent boy who had gone through a lot. He thought about him; from his boxy smiles to his dorky laughter and antics. It had been too long since they'd seen it and it reminded him how much he missed him- so much so that Hoseok finally found the courage to grab the door knob, ready to twist it open if the others so much as signalled him to.

And he looked to them, a big smile on his face.

Hoseok's aware that his smiles were contagious and it proved to be true even in the most ridiculous of ways and situations. Even then, it didn't disappoint. Even when all of his members looked like they were seconds away from sprinting off, his smile spread all the way to each of their faces.