A teardrop fell that night when all he could think about was that letter he was typing. He had never written that kind of letter before. Come to think of it, why was it raining outside. The moon wasn’t even out. It couldn’t have been darker. He sat there writing about how it was no one’s fault really, just that he was unhappy and he didn’t see the point in living. There was no one there for him, no one there to tell him how important he is. He didn’t think he would ever be writing this, who knows if he would do it or not. The question came to him, how would he do it when he was going to do it? Hang? No, that would be too much suffering. Drown? That’s too much like hanging…hmm, what’s peaceful and absolutely no pain involved. He did a little internet surfing and found a forum talking about the least painful ways to go. Someone mentioned nitrous oxide, N02. He read that all you have to do is purchase a N02 tank, a hose and a mask. You just lay down, turn the tank on, put the mask over your face and never wake up. This sounded like a great idea to him, why not? What else does he really have to live for. He always talked about how the next life had to be better than the one he lived in now. What’s the worst that could happen? It just turns black and there is no heaven or hell. Well if that was the case then nothing even mattered at all. As he sat there typing away he did much thinking. Wishing he could go back in time and change some things he did. Mainly choices he made, certain choices that landed him in the place he was at now. No matter what he did, where he went, who he talked with, he was always alone. No one could prove him otherwise. He wished for death not because he was depressed, but because he hated living, with all his heart, he hated being alive. He was sure this is what he wanted…
