Devil I Jikook I

Every

JIMIN'S POV

I woke up to Hobi gently shaking me. "Jimin, you're gonna be late." I lazily blinked at him, feeling utterly exhausted.

"I don't feel well. I'm going to stay here today." Hobi stared at me with a slight frown but eventually nodded.

"Alright, Chim. Do you want me to stay with you?" I frantically shook my head.

"Didn't you say you have a test today? I'm not that sick, I'll be fine," I insist with a tiny smile. Hobi nodded again, chewing on his lip.

"I'll see you after class then. Don't hesitate to text me if you need anything. We have some leftovers in the fridge if you get hungry."

"Okay hyung," I respond with reluctant cheerfulness, forcing a smile on my lips. Hobi turned away, removing his earbuds from his pocket as he walked to the bedroom door. Just as he was about to leave the room, I piped up, "Hyung!" He looked at me, back now facing the open door.

"I love you." I blushed in embarrassment, but each word was genuine. His face softened.

"I love you too, Jiminie." He smiled at me before leaving, closing the door behind him.

Heaving a sigh, I swung my legs off my bed, wobbling to my desk. Finding a piece of printer paper laying on top of a textbook, I fold it in half and carefully rip it. Grabbing a nearby pen, I write out a short note.

Hobi hyung,

I'm sorry I broke my promise.

X Jimin

Letting out an unsteady breath, I set the pen down, looking at the paper in front of me. The letters were crooked and squiggly because of my trembling hands. I folded the remaining half of the printer paper and stuffed it in a pocket of my shorts, cramming the pen in my other pocket. Not wanting to waste time, I padded to Hobi's neatly-made bed and set the piece of paper on top of his pillow.

Forgive me Hobi.

Fighting back the tears, I entered the bathroom. I had been creating a plan ever since the tallies appeared, and considering I didn't have much time left; I believed it was finally time to implement my idea.

I hurt Jungkook in the worst possible way, so what I'm doing is justified.

Staring in the mirror, I didn't see the lively, outgoing boy people said I was; I saw a broken, weak boy. I looked down at my wrist, the white tallies seeming to pulse in time with my rapidly beating heart.

I need to do this.

I opened the medicine cabinet and brought out the orange, translucent sleeping pill bottle. I emptied the contents in my hand, captivated by the smooth, white pills.

I'll finally be free. Jungkook will be free. These will save us.

Placing the pills on the rim of the bathtub, I removed the pen and paper from my pocket, carefully unfolding the sheet. Trying to will my hands to stop shaking, I wrote one last note on the sheet:

It's not like I had much time left anyway.

I then furled the paper and put it into the empty pill bottle. Losing control over my tears, they began to stream down my face. Finding the pills despite my blurred sight, I scooped them up.

Forgive me Yoongi.

I climbed into the bathtub, using the back of my hand to wipe away the tears and momentarily clear my vision. Looking at the pills in my right hand and the tallies on the same wrist, I knew that what I was doing was right.

Forgive me Tae.

Tossing them into my mouth, I gulped them all down, barely managing to avoid my gag reflex.

Forgive me Namjoon.

Sitting in the bathtub, I looked up at the ceiling, letting tears obscure my sight again.

This was the right choice. It benefits everyone. Jungkook won't have to worry about me hurting him again. He can finally enjoy his college years. Hobi won't have to take care of me anymore, Yoongi won't fear for Jungkook because of me, everything will be better.

Maybe I should've done this sooner.

I wasn't here for that long; I doubt they'll miss me. It's easy to forget me.

The world started to look fuzzy, black spots dancing in front of me. Every inch of me just felt tired, each limb a burden to support. I was slipping away.

My life started to flash before my eyes, beginning at Busan and ending there, in a bathtub, surrounded by nothing but my thoughts. My shirt was soaked, black overtaking my vision.

I always wondered what my last words would be. I thought it would be something cheesy, or even a bad pun. I thought I'd die with my loved ones by my side, yet there I was, alone.

I could only utter a few words before the darkness swallowed me.

"I'm so sorry Jungkookie."