goodbye | bts

and

the last fanmeeting.

seven idols, walk upon a raised
table, and take their seats.

fans begin to trickle, then pour, then rush.

stream, to river, to ocean.

a girl
in red.

smiles at
jung hoseok.

"hope. our hope,
you have been
so strong, for
all of us. and you
are one of the bravest
people i know. but,
hope, even you can't
be happy, all the time"

she takes his hand.
she smiles.

"let it out.
boys cry too,
it's okay to cry"

and jung hoseok,
allows the tears to fall.

the youngest boy,
is tired.

of being here
of holding it together
pretending that,
it's okay.

the oldest boy,
tries to smile
but his face cracks
and his facade falls away.

the oldest and youngest look at eachother, looking into the others eyes.

seeing the unmaskable pain.

they join hands
and hope
that no matter
what happens

someday

time will allow them
to meet
one more

but
how many
sleepless nights
will they wait?

the boy with the box smile,
and the boy with the plump lips.

greet fans
and say goodbye

instead, they wish
that they could say sorry
for not paying more attention
to the faces
and voices
and names of their fans

the people who
has bought them so far
and given them so much.

park jimin broke.

reaching for the first hand he could find, he grasped it, eyes shut tight,

and he aplogised.

"i'm sorry, too"
kim taehyung replied.

jimin opened his eyes.
and smiled.

they went back
to greeting fans

but not once
did their hands
break the connection
between them.

the leader was saddened
why?
he though
why couldn't i protect
them better?

why do they
have to be unhappy?

why can i not take
their pain away?

but in reality, he
felt it too.

he'd felt it before,
for a long time.
and now he
was glad that

he had cherished,
the calm before the storm.

"suga"
the boy winced in pain.
his name.

his name he would only hear
a few, precious
more times

after this was over
where would he go?
who would he have?

this family,
that loved him,
more than his own.

would they still accept him?
would he be loved
as himself?
seen as a person?
with feelings?

his head hurt
his heart hurt.
he hurt.

he took a breath.
and released it all.

he reached out,
and greeted the next fan.

as suga.
before he,
would become
normal,
once again.

and in all of their heads,
the fans words,
rattled and shook,
in their minds.

goodbye, bangtan