Godless Girl

Chapter 8

Aurora's POV

Autumn leads me down a trail similar to the one that leads to the tent I share with Hope. After a long walk, Autumn and I end up at a small clearing with a sunset orange tent and I can hear running water somewhere nearby. "Come on, it's right over here!" she says, grabbing my hand and running down a hill behind the tent. I see a beautiful and clear creek with tiny trout swimming through it. "Wow," I gasp. "This is really incredible." Autumn smiles and nods at me, walking across stones.

"Want to see something even better?" she asks me. I nod enthusiastically and follow her across the cold creek. She leads me up the creek and around a looming cliff. On the other side there is a waterfall which opens into a large pool of water. Autumn beckons me to a space behind the waterfall where you can walk. Behind the raining sheet of water it's cooler and dark. I stick my arm through the sheet and enjoy the feeling of cold water rushing over my skin while Autumn laughs and reaches her arm out too.

"Do you wanna take a dip?" she yells over the sound of the waterfall. "Yeah! Sounds fun to me!" I yell back. She takes my hand again and leads me to the side of the plunge pool and takes off her shoes. I sit on the grass and take my converse off while Autumn jumps in, giggling. After I pull off my socks, I stand up and leap into the cold water. "Oh my god! It's freezing in here!" I yell to Autumn who is running her fingers through her wet hair and laughing. She dips under the surface and reappears next to me and says, "Don't worry, you get used to it. It's cold at first, but then it feels so comfortable that you'll never want to leave."

Still shivering and clenching my jaw, I roll my eyes and walk slowly through the water in attempts to warm up. Even though I feel chilled to the bone I can't help but be captivated by the sight around me. The waterfall is glittering like diamonds, the trees are full and green and light filters through them beautifully.

I kick my feet up in the water and begin floating on my back to watch the clouds pass and birds travel between tree branches. A hand grabs mine beneath the water and I turn my head to the side to see Autumn also floating on her back and smiling at me. I see her mouth "Beautiful, right?" so I nod and continue to look at the sky.

Her hand releases mine as she swims to a smooth rock on the shore and pulls herself up to sit on it. Hesitantly, I stop floating and make my way to sit beside her. The rock is surprisingly warm from the sun and is a nice change from the water, so I lay back on it and stretch out. "So, Aurora," Autumn begins. "Who are you really?" My eyebrows furrow at this and I try to understand what she means exactly.

Who am I? I'm really nobody so there isn't much to say. "Nobody," I tell her. "I'm just some edgy, atheist girl that a lot of people hate. I don't do much, I don't say much. Pretty boring person." I shrug my shoulders and sit back up to face her. She shakes her head and rolls her eyes at me, but continues to watch the scenery in silence.

Eventually she meets my gaze and chuckles. "There's gotta be more to you than that. You're only describing yourself in the way that you're seen, but I think that brain of yours is a lot more complex, right? Maybe you're just humble. Or maybe I'm just expecting too much, I have been told I tend to do that." Autumn rambles and looks away again at the waterfall. I feel like what I told her was pretty accurate and I'm just average and uninteresting, which I'm actually okay with.

"No, I'd say that's about it. I spend most of my time just reading or wasting time on the internet. The only thing interesting about me is that I'm this giant weirdo to pretty much everyone in our small ass town, but especially to this cult of Catholics. I might not fit in, but other than that I'm nothing special."

Autumn starts to laugh quietly and eventually dissolves into hysterical laughter. Confused, I just sit there waiting to get the punchline to a joke I didn't even know was told. She slaps my knee playfully and wheezes. "What's so funny??" I ask, starting to become aggravated. Her laughing subsides slowly and she clears her throat. "I just find it funny how you think you're nothing special, but a lot of people would disagree. Some in a negative way, but I've also heard that you're incredibly special for being yourself unapologetically. Even if people don't like you, they still think you're cool because you're not fake. Everyone here? Fake as a silicone tit. But you? Nah, you're this girl who stands tall and you don't seem ashamed of yourself. A proud, slightly edgy lesbian." she laughs a bit more and smiles at me. I scoff and turn away from her, pulling my knees to my chest.

"Did I say something wrong?" Autumn whispers. I feel my eyes begin to pool with hot tears and wipe them quickly. " No, I just-" my voice wavers and my throat feels tight. "None of that is true. I'm not standing tall or proud of myself or anything. I didn't even come out as lesbian! How can I be authentic when I haven't even expressed who I am? Trust me, I have done nothing but try to fly under the radar." I sigh and rest my chin on my knees.

"Wait, WHAT?! You haven't even come out?!" Autumn exclaims and shakes her head. "Oh, wait are you actually lesbian then? Is that what everyone just says? Oh my god I am so sorry, I never would have said anything to you about it if I ha-" "Of course I'm gay!" I interrupt, snapping around to look at her. Her mouth stays open like a goldfish. Slowly I start to giggle while Autumn stares at me with wide eyes. My giggling turns into a full fit of laughter and I wipe the remaining wetness from my face.

Eventually I stop laughing and sigh. "So you're telling me you're gay and no one else is technically supposed to know? Because um, I'm pretty sure that everyone knows." She says to me, eyes still as round as the moon. I shrug and nod, saying, "Yeah, I guess. I never officially told anyone, but obviously I have dated some girls. I thought it was pretty discreet, but whispers spread through the grapevine like wildfire."

Autumn shakes her head again and huffs. "So you really are something special then," she says. "Maybe not in the way I was expecting, but definitely still extraordinary." This brings a smirk to my face and I thank her. "That's nice of you to say, Autumn. I'm not sure if I've been called extraordinary before. Or at least, not in a positive tone." She smiles back at me, chuckling. "Sure thing. Now tell me some more about yourself and then I'll compliment you further."

Autumn and I continue to chat about life and I find myself opening up to her, even though she was just a stranger a few hours ago. She already feels like a friend. This camping trip might just be saved after all.

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Hey, pals! Sorry again for disappearing for MONTHS and not updating. Things just get really busy and blah blah blah. I've got a laptop now instead of my awful tiny phone though, so hopefully I'll be able to crank out some more chapters faster. Thank you for reading!!