𝑺𝒐𝒖𝒕𝒉𝒆𝒓𝒏 𝑪𝒐𝒖𝒓𝒕𝒔𝒉𝒊𝒑 ▷ 𝑵𝒆𝒈𝒂𝒏

• Southern Courtship ; 17 •

Right now, I just needed a cigarette. Aiden use to bring them for me. To think that he'd fight all day, scavenging, maybe even face a few near death experiences, but nonetheless, when the opportunity presented itself, he always found a way to get me what I wanted. Unfortunately, the memories of those poisonous leaves reignited my disparity from that day. When I received the dreadful news.

I hadn't dreamed of him in weeks. Sometimes I didn't want to, other times the nightmares were all that held me together. Any sight of him was just a reminder, even if it was just the way my brain convinced me he died. Devoured, and alone. Seeing him, even in my lucidity was enough to keep me going. Over those past months that followed, I wasn't the same girl anymore. Family suddenly carried a different meaning. Suddenly, I needed it.

I rolled my shoulders, trying to release the surfacing tension.The thought of him managed to bring tears to my eyes every single time, but I wiped them away, refusing to let anyone see that I was crying - especially someone here. Weakness wasn't an option. Being here, I had to be fearless - strong.

I strutted down the corridor, eyes peeled for anything suspicious or out of normal order. So far, everything seemed quiet. No one stopped me. Probably didn't even take notice. I was headed towards the large expanse in the building, but stopped to admire it from the platform. The marketplace down below carried silent white noise of whispers and exchange, as each person shuffled by in search of their basic needs.

Suddenly, I could feel the world moving in slow motion all around. One man, holding a can of beans in his hands, removed the cap on his head and pointed at me, for all else to take notice.

"Deliana!" He shouted, making me widen my eyes in surprise and evident fear.

It wasn't new to have people looking at me, but I can't say I missed the nervous feeling it brought. All those around the man glanced up, then others followed in suit. The man got to his knee, bowing his head in respect. My heart pounded against my chest once I noticed everyone else doing exactly the same. I wasn't sure what to do, in the moment, as they all returned their gaze to me, still on their knees.

"Thank you," I said quietly, "But you don't have to kneel for me. I'm not Negan," I added, using my hand to signal for them to rise.

I wasn't sure how to feel. They had never done that before. They barely paid any mind to me before. So, when in the hell would they have decided that I was worthy enough to kneel for? I basically ran down the stairs with my head hanging as they returned to their feet. I figured Negan was the one that told them to do that for me.

After pretty much avoiding the crowd altogether, I walked over to the produce, and canned or jarred goods. Here, people worked in a point system. Fortunately though, being a wife of Negan meant I got whatever the hell I wanted free of charge. I understood why other women agreed to his deal. He disproved of rape, so he wouldn't force them into anything, but it was just casual sex if they did decide to participate. I doubted any of them loved him in the slightest. But they did what they had to, to survive like I had the first time I was here. You make a decision. You choose to live, or you choose to die. We chose to live.

From a short distance, I spotted the woman taking note of every item that was exchanged for points. She was an elderly lady, hair already greying significantly. She was wearing an apron, and dealing with a line of people. Respectfully, I stepped to the back of the line, not wanting to cut in front of anyone. To my surprise, as soon as I had, the ones standing in line before me, generously stepped aside, allowing for a straight passage to the front. I furrowed my brows, once again surprised with the way these people were treating me.