After saying that, Andy hugged me. Right there in the middle of the street. He hugged me for what felt like an eternity. I felt so safe in his arms, I didn't want to move. When he let me go, I realized I was crying. I rubbed my eyes and acted like I was just tired, but I knew he saw. He grabbed my hand and we walked silently back to Jinxx and Sammi's house.
As we walked in the door, everything was quiet. Jake, Ashley, and CC were all sitting on the couch, the TV was on but muted, and they were having a conversation, which ended when we walked in. Jinxx and Sammi were no where in sight. Andy leaned down towards my ear.
"I know you have more than just the one, I'm not stupid. Bring them to me, now." He said it sternly, but softly.
I swiftly walked towards my room, but stopped when I saw Jinxx coming out of his and Sammi's room. He just looked at me.
"Does she hate me?" I whispered.
He smiled a weak smile. "Of course she doesn't, Cora. She loves you, you know that. She's just worried about you. I got her to fall asleep, and you should do the same, okay?" He patted me gently on the shoulder.
I nodded, slowly opening the door to my room. I pulled all of the blades from under the bed, the dresser, and the window, stacking them in a small pile. I went into the bathroom and wrapped them in toilet paper before taking them to Andy. As I layed them in his hand, I could see he was surprised by how many there were.
"We're gonna go." Andy said, and all the guys got up, as if that was their cue to leave. They all nodded their Goodbyes and walked out the door.
"I'm sorry." I whispered.
"Shh. Don't be sorry, it's okay. I'll see you tomorrow, okay?"
I nodded, looking down.
"Goodnight." He said slowly as he leaned down to kiss my head.
He left, and I sat down on the couch, my breathing uneven. I hadn't even been here a day, and I ruined everything. I walked to the window and looked outside. The stars were so pretty tonight. Opening the door quietly, I walked outside and began walking down the street, staring at the stars.
I walked down a familiar street and stopped in front of a familiar house. I could almost see my parents, lying in bed. My dad snoring so loud he shook the whole place, my mom curled into a little ball. It was so tempting to just walk inside and lay in my old bed. But I knew the price that would cost me. Going back in that house would mean losing everything.
The porch light came on and my stomach dropped. I started running as fast as I could back towards Sammi's house. When I was about halfway back to her house, I stopped running and sat down on the curb, catching my breath. My side was in so much pain, I couldn't move without being in agony. I screamed out, and a few dogs started barking at me. I layed back on the grass, and covered my face with my hands.
I layed there until dawn. When I opened my eyes, I could see the sun coming up. I got up slowly, wincing at the pain, and walked back to Jinxx and Sammi's. When I walked through the door, I saw Sammi sitting in the kitchen.
"What are you doing up so early?" She asked quietly.
"Late." I corrected. "I haven't been to sleep yet."
"You've been out all night?" Her eyes grew wide.
I nodded, sitting down next to her. "Listen, Sammi, please don't be angry with me. I know how you feel about.. about that, and I know I shouldn't have done it. I'm so sorry. Please forgive me, I love you, you're like a sister to me." I looked at the table, tears welling up in my eyes.
"It's okay." She sighed. "I know how much pressure you've been under, I know. Just promise you won't do it again?"
I closed my eyes. "Sammi, I can't promise that. But I will promise to try to stop, okay? I promise. I swear. I'll try."
