Chapter 9
I eat when I am sad to make me feel better.
An hour later I am looking in the mirror hating myself.
I don't want to live my life like this.
My marriage is falling a part so I have gained a ton a weight.
Then I look at myself, and think no one can love me.
Why do I base how I feel on others?
I need to love myself, and not care what others think of me.
I need to find happiness, and not count on others to make me happy.
People will disappointment you that's a given.
People will hurt you because well that's life.
But if I trust in myself I can't go wrong.
I have been told I am an inspiration, and if that's true then I need to be a good role model.
I can't be this depressed woman that hates herself in private, and has all the answers for everyone else.
That isn't fair to me, or anyone else.
I am tired of crying.
I am tired of hating who I am.
This all stops today.
I need to take my life back.
I want to inspire people starting with myself.
I want to help others.
I need to first help myself in order to do that.
I can't always be invisible.
