A One Time Experience | Andrew Clark |

07

A janitor walks into the room. We all look at him and he looks at us.
"Brian, how you doing?"
"Your dad works here?" Bender spoke.
"Uh, Carl?"
"What?"
"Can I ask you a question?"
"Sure..."
"How does one become a janitor?"
"You wanna be a a janitor?"
" No I just wanna know how one becomes a janitor because Andrew here, is very interested in persuing a career in the custodial arts..."
"Oh, really?  You guys think I'm just some untouchable peasant?  Peon Huh?  Maybe so, but following a broom around after shitheads like you for the past eight years I've learned a couple of things...I look through your letters, I look through your lockers...I listen to your conversations, you don't know that but I do...I am the eyes and ears of this institution my friends.  By the way, that clock's twenty minutes fast!" Carl points to the clock and grins.
"Shit!" Andrew yells.

11:30. Mr. Vernon walked in and Bender started whistling Beethoven's 5th.
"Alright girls, that's thirsty minutes for lunch."
"Here?" Andrew asked.
"Here."
"Well I think the cafeteria would be a more suitable place for us to eat lunch in, sir." Way to be an ass, Andrew.
"Well, I don't care what you think, Andrew!"
"Uh, Dick? Excuse me.. Rich.. Will milk be made available to us sir?" Bender spoke.
"We're extremely thirsty sir." Andrew quickly said after.
"I have a very low tolerance for dehydration, sir." Clair spoke.
"I've seen her dehydrate sir, it's pretty gross."
Bender stood up. "Relax, i'll get it!"
"Ah, ah, ah, grab some wood there, bub! What do you think, I was born yesterday? You think i'm gonna have you roaming these halls?" He paused and pointed at Andrew. "You!" He pointed at me. "And you! Hey, what's her name? Come on, get on your feet, missy! Let's go!" I quickly stood up and walked over to Andrew.
"There's a soft drink machine in the teachers lounge. Let's go!"

We were silently walking down the hall when Andrew spoke up to ask me something.
"What's your poison?"
I stayed quiet. I didn't want to answer.
"What do you drink?"
I stayed silent again.
"Okay.. Forget I asked.."
I waited a few seconds before I spoke. "I really don't drink. But when I do people give me too much."
"Is that why you're here today?"
I stayed quiet.
"Why are you here?"
We stopped walking and Andrew leaned against a wall.
"Um, I'm here today...because uh, because my coach and my father don't want me to blow my ride. See I get treated differently because uh, Coach thinks I'm a winner. So does my old man. I'm not a winner because I wanna be one... I'm a winner because I got strength and speed. Kinda like a race horse. That's about how involved I am in what's happening to me."
"Moving. Now tell me why you're really here."
"Forget it!"

We all had our lunches. I packed my own lunch, three turkey sandwiches, one bag of Cheetos that was half gone and three cans of Pepsi.
"What's in there?" Bender asked Claire.
"Guess, wheres your lunch?"
"You're wearing it.."
"You're nauseating."
I lifted the top piece of bread off my sandwich and put as many Cheetos as I could on. I put the bread back on and took a bite and then a sip of my Pepsi.
"Fatty's really enjoying her lunch, isn't she?" Bender questioned and I looked at him. I swallowed the food and took another bite, looking back down.
"What's that?" Bender, again, questioned Claire.
"Sushi."
"Sushi?"
"Rice.. Raw fish and seaweed.."
"You won't accept a guys' tongue in your mouth but you'll eat that?"
"Can I eat?"
"I dunno.. Give it a try."
I opened my second can of Pepsi and ate a couple of Cheetos. I saw Bender walk over to Brian and they discussed what Brian had. I looked up when Bender started yelling, switching between a kids voice and a loud voice.
"Son!
Yeah dad?
How's your day, pal?
Great dad, how's yours?
Super, say, son, how'd you like to go fishing this weekend?
Great dad, but i've got homework to do!
You can do it on the boat!
Gee!
Dear, isn't our son swell?
Yes dear, isn't life swell?"
He imitated what i'm assuming a mother and father kissing, then the father punching the mother. I choked on my food 
"Alright, what about your family?" Andrew asked. Bender imitated life at his house, which I didn't even want to see.
"Is that for real?" Brian asked.
"You wanna come over?"
"That's bullshit, it's all apart of your image." Andrew didn't believe any of it, and Bender looked hurt.
"You don't believe me?"
"No."
"No?"
"Did I stutter?"
He walked over to Andrew, pulling up his sleeve to reveal a circular shaped burn.
"Do you believe this?  Huh?  It's about the size of a cigar...Do I stutter?  You see, this is what you get in my house when you spill paint in the garage." He started to walk away.
"See I don't think that I need to sit here with you fuckin' dildos anymore!"
He walks over to the map table and throws all of them on the floor, then climbed up the railing to the second floor.
"You shouldn't have said that." I spoke.
Andrew turned around. "How would I know, I mean he lies about everything anyway!"