Him & I

6-Maddy

When I told him that we'd forget it, I never thought it would be so hard. Pushing the thoughts of Anna onto the backburner were excruciating. I did it for a while though.

Chase was my best friend. I didn't tell Dawson that I'd go to his house all the time. We watched movies and went places and talked about everything. I realized that I liked him a bit. I knew he liked me, because he'd always tell me how horrible Dawson was to me, and wanted us to break up.

I almost did.

Chase started telling people what I said. I had told him that Dawson and I might be breaking up soon, so I'd be up for a rebound. I told him not to tell a soul, but he did. I called them rumours, and Dawson beleived me.

I stopped talking to Chase.

I wish I hadn't though, he was my best friend.

I realized that Dawson had started keeping me away from my friends. I'd always be with him, and he'd be upset if I ditched him for them.

I started losing my friends because of this. Some of his friends were ok, but a few weren't. Shawn and I had a decent repertoire, so that was alright. He never talked much anyways.

Dawson had started doing dip, which was chewing tobacco. I started too. If you can't beat em' join em'. So we were doing that every day.

One of his friends, Cory, brought a bottle of alcohol to school one day. At lunch we went to his house, and did shots and drank the rest of the bottle. We went back to school drunk, and the boys got in trouble, but I wasn't caught.

Cory had started driving us places with only his learners permit. We'd go buy cigarettes, and dip, and booze at a depaneur that wouldn't card us.

I could see us all falling into a pit. It was terrible. I stopped doing drugs.

I wanted Dawson to stop too. He told me he did, but at my 16th birthday I found out he had been lying to me. I saw a can of dip in his pocket, so I threw it in the fire.

He was pissed.

One of his friends that I hated sold him a vape, which was ok at first, but he promised me no nicotine. I vaped with him. There was always nicotine. He never got rid of his vape.

He always lied.