angel on fire { halsey }

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halsey

I was standing by my locker when she passed me

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I was standing by my locker when she passed me. She looked different today, restless and nervous; didn't even glance at me. Her long blue hair was bouncing up and down as she stormed down the hallway.
I knew where she was going; I shut my locker, pulled a strand of blonde hair from my face and followed her.

Ashley was one of those people that others find odd 95% of the time. She stood out in our little town that seemed like a cage; way too small for her to really be free. Dying her hair blue, she felt like she finally freed herself a little, but her parents took it as acting out; it resulted in being looked down on by everyone. When I first met her, I was completely overwhelmed by her presence. It was in my sophomore year when she transferred and the sadness in her eyes felt too familiar.

I found her painting in our art classroom after school; headphones on her head, face focused and her white shirt stained from paint. I watched her for a while, she didn't notice. Her velvet red lipstick faded away and her eyes had a golden gleam in them. She was a work of art creating chaos.
A part of me loved her from that day, even though I didn't know her.
For a long time I was just watching, wondering what she's about and what it would be like if I just came up to her and said hi. And for a long time I was convinced that I could never keep up with her, she was a fire burning bright and I was just a tiny flame, slowly fading away.

"Interesting piece. What is it?" I asked quietly as I took a few steps closer. She looked at me, feeling tense, I could sense it right away. It changed though, a few seconds later she just seemed relieved that I was the one who stepped in the classroom, not someone else. Her lips curved into a small smile while she continued painting.

"It's California. Come look." She said. I've never heard her speak before. Words cannot describe how sweet that girl sitting in front of me was. I did what she requested and after walking even closer, I was standing behind her, observing her work. I liked it, she used a lot of orange and red. It went perfectly with the blue.

"You like the seaside?" I asked a question with a rather obvious answer but I wanted to break the ice. She had the ability to calm me down and make me nervous at the same time.

"Mhm. I'm gonna move there after I graduate high school." She confidently said. "Do you like the beach?"

"Yeah, I do actually. I always wanted to live in a tiny beach house." I chuckled. She turned her head and looked straight into my eyes. I wasn't used to such intensity when it comes to eye contact.

"Cool. Then we can leave this bad place behind together." She grinned. I only nodded, returning the smile.
I would have gone anywhere with her.

I opened the door of a third floor bathroom. Only one stall had an actual toilet that functioned, the bathroom was mostly used for a quick smoke or so. We usually came there for that reason or to get some space and just talk. She was sitting on the window ledge, cigarette already between her lips. There were tears in her eyes, tiny glitters covering the slightly dark circles under them, melting away.
I approached her and put my bag next to her. I didn't have to say anything, I knew what was wrong.
I took a seat behind her and she leaned on me. Taking the cigarette from her hand, I made one puff and threw it in the sink. My other arm was wrapped around her body while she held onto it tight. She was sniffling, tears streaming down her rosy cheeks.

"I don't know how I'm gonna wait until graduation, I can't take it anymore D." She mumbled. "I hate it here!"

I felt her pain, a part of it was mine as well. I hated this town; it was a small hick place where you got weird looks if you did or thought anything even remotely different or outside the box. We could never stay here.

"Don't give up now, just a little more. Two months and we're done." I assured her that we'll be fine. We always found a way to be okay.

"Promise me. Promise we'll be alright." She said and pressed a kiss on my arm.

"Promise." I replied.
And I meant it.

_____

And we did. We made it.
A year into college we moved into a dorm room together and have been inseparable ever since, more than before. I was the one that understood her bits and pieces, the one who could solve her as if she's the biggest, most complicated riddle. I felt her soul, I gave her true love, it's what her heart always desired. After graduating college, we found a tiny apartment by the beach in LA, just to get started and settle in. It was perfect for us. We'd wake up on the weekend, have breakfast on the deck, take a walk on the beach, make lunch together. In the night she would drag me out to dance. We'd drink, sometimes a bit too much and we would run down the beach and scream, kiss under the stars and lie in the warm sand with our feet buried in it.

"Do you think they still remember us back home?" She asked as we were sitting on the beach, smoking. The ocean was still warm and our feet were dipped in it just a little bit.

"Probably. I don't care though." I said, blowing out the smoke. She scooted closer and put her hand on mine, intertwining our fingers. I'll never forget how beautiful she looked that night. Her blue hair dancing in the breeze, her lips red and her eyes gleamy yet again. She was smiling widely, then leaned in and kissed me. I closed my eyes just for a second and inhaled her scent when she leaned her head on my shoulder, placing a small kiss on the top of her head. She smelled of lilies, it felt like getting lost in the lilac sky.

"I love you." She whispered.

"I love you." I replied and pulled her closer.

In that moment I knew she'll be mine forever. What we have is very rare; once in a lifetime rare and I had no intention of giving it up. I was red and she was blue... when I touched her she turned purple and it's just what I always wanted. Her.
She was my angel on fire burning bright and beside her I was no longer a tiny flame fading away; I was burning again and she was my gasoline.

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