a corruption of the mind [r.t.]

12

**serious gore warning, read at your own risk

— May 10th, 1993

     How many days had it been since you were gone? He didn't know anymore, having spent the last few days of his life inside, a cigarette in one hand and a bottle of Gin in the other. School was just a place where he would get looks of sorrow, so it was better to just hang out in the empty room where you spent your last days. The amount of tears that stained your bed could have been enough to make it look like you had peed yourself. Of course, that didn't matter anymore, people mature. And go. The moment you had your funeral, he saw how fake everyone around you really was, and came to understand why. Why you decided to leave your life behind, decided to kill yourself. Everyone around you was scum, and so was he. He wasn't there when you needed him, and that pained him even more, but was left with some type of happiness when he finally found your hidden letter just to him. It was as though you knew that he would take apart that dumb bear out of anger, and see that envelope which held your last words. All he could think was that he was grateful that you knew him so well.

             Dear Richie,

Hey bud, sorry to leave you hanging around in this shithole. Ha, sorry for being so fucking dumb, this is my death letter and don't even take that seriously. So, I want to apologize. For leaving you, for not being serious enough. For not talking to you. You knew, you saw what he did to me, yet I never gained the courage to tell you what was happening to me. Every day I saw you, I felt a pang in my heart because there was someone else. Someone who was taking me to his house and taking away bits of life I still had left in me. If it weren't for you, I think I would have ended it much sooner, to be honest. You were and have been my light, but when I realized that nothing was going to change, no matter how far I tried to run away from it, I knew it was too late. Tell Miss Cindy that I really enjoyed our conversations about how we would invite her to our wedding, and name our first girl after her. 

Other than that, I wanted to tell you that I love you. I always have, and always will. My precious trashmouth, I will always cherish the moments we had and will wait for you up here when the time comes for you. I want you to know that even if you forget me, I will always look over you, and make sure you are happy. I may not be there with you physically, but I will in your heart. You cannot escape me. Hahahaha that sounded like I was going to haunt you, doesn't it? But if it helps you, then think of me as Casper the Friendly Ghost, except I'm a girl and I don't think that ghosts would be all that friendly in real life. Take care of yourself, I want you to be a strong man that will take away every girl's heart. Just like you took mine. 

Be a good boy, and have fun.

[Name] [Last Name].

     Something stood out the most about those words, a thing that crossed his mind. No matter how much she wanted him to live happily, he couldn't. If he couldn't even leave the comfort of your sheets, then how could he keep moving on? There was one thing he really wanted to do. A certain person who caused most of your suffering, and caused his years of mental scarring. Most nights all he could hear was his voice pushing him down, knocking his glasses off his face, and destroying them. It wasn't until he got older and joined some of the stoners that he left him alone, but that left the rest to fend for themselves. But now, he would make him pay. He wouldn't get away with this.

     His feet walked on their own, going down your stairs and making their way to your cupboards where the weapon of mass destruction laid. The plans in his mind rushed around, and finally he decided on one more thing. He put your radio in his backpack, some of the food you left, and the knife. Henry would probably already have the rope, so that was fine. Yeah, Henry might have been big before, but Richie now stood at the same level as him, and he was ready to fight. And to kill.