〰️BTS~ 8th Member〰️. ᴼᴺ ᴴᴼᴸᴰ

It hurts

Your POV
I felt someone tap on my shoulder and whisper in my ear. "Y/n-ah, wake up we are back." I slowly get up and look around. I see Jimin and smile. He smiles back and we get out of the van. Once I saw the rest of the boys I instantly pulled all of them inside their dorm.

"Y/n? What are u doing?" Tae asks. "I have to remove your makeup, it's not good for your skin to have makeup this long and plus sweating with it." I say and grab my makeup wipes. I ask who's first and Yoongi instantly said himself. He sits down and I put on a cute head band with fluffy bear ears on it, making my eyes sparkle of cuteness.

I carefully press down on his face and rub his face with the damp makeup wipe. "You can press harder you know?" He says. I nod. "I just don't want to hurt you, that's all" he laughs. "It won't hurt" I nod and press a little harder. Once I finished I grabbed the hair brush and brushed his hair to get the hair spray out. Soon after his hair was nice and soft. "Okay, now go take a shower and wash your body, especially your face, to get rid of any makeup I missed." He nods and pats my head. " thanks Y/n, you are the best, usually the other makeup artists don't do any of this, they just let us go home." I look slightly up and give him my famous eye smile. "It's nothing really, I don't mind doing it." And off he goes.

I asked who was next and Jin wanted to go cause he wanted to have a shower and do eat Jin. I put on a head band with a fluffy Mario hat on it. I personally made head bands that would look cute on them. (Like the 3D ones like bunny ears, you guys get it right?) Jins eyes light up and he loved the head band. I had to use 3 face wipes since Jins make up was always going wrong when the other makeup artists re-did his makeup.

"Jin oppa?" He hums in response. "I'm a good enough? I mean like with how I look and how I do things?" I say quietly. I wanted to ask Jin cause he was older and I trusted him like my older....brother... "Omo Y/n! Of course. Just be yourself. We would always accept you for who you are. Are you getting thoughts again?"

Jin POV
She nods. I don't know what to do or how to calm her down to get those bad thoughts out of her head. "Everything will be fine, try get those thoughts out and think happy." She nods. She then bows and says that I'm done. "Also, take a shower and wash your face well in case I missed any makeup on you face" she says quietly. No artists ever said or did this to us, we were always told to go home and do it ourselves. I thank her and give her a hug.

Once I'm out, I go tell Jungkook and the others on how she is feeling at the moment.

Your POV
Ugh tonight isn't the time to be all depressed. By the time Jin left, I hear rain start heavily. I sigh and wait for the next person to come in.

Once everyone was done and had their showers, it was now my turn to get ready for bed. Even tho it was only 7pm, I get really tired. Even before I got this job. Everyday after school before I would always come home, do homework, eat dinner and go to bed.

I get out my other packet of makeup wipes that were stronger than the ones I used on the boys, since I know their skin is sensitive. Iv gotten a new product that most Koreans use to get rid of acne, and it works slowly so Iv started using that. I'm not sure if I will get a reaction but I hardly doubt that.

Once I did that I go get clothes and go back into the bathroom. I placed down the towel and my clothes on the other side. Then a small blade falls to the ground. Hmmm... A couple wouldn't hurt I guess. I grab the blade and run the shower. I take my clothes off and get under the nice warm water.

I look down and think of places to cut myself. Maybeeee my wrists? No no, too obvious. Ankles? Too obvious again. Neck...? Nahh next time. Thighs? Perfectt. I sit down and start slashing.
Blood...
Pain..
Pleasure..
It's good to get all of my anger out and sadness out of me. All you could see was blood, going down the drain. I laughed a bit. That felt nice. I get up and rinse my thighs. I get out and look in the mirror to see if there was any bandages, and luckily there was. Would it be obvious that I took them? Nahhh. I rip the long bandage in half and wrap them around both thighs and tie a cute little bow.

This time I put on my bunny onesie and instantly felt so tired. I see the boys doing their own stuff and when they heard the door open their eyes were all on me. I fe,t like they knew what I did but they just smile. "SHE LOOKS SO CUTEEEEE" Hobi oppa yells. I shyly smile and everyone is still in aw.

"I'll be in my room, I'll skip dinner since I'm not hungry." I bow and head upstairs into my room. Once I shut the door I sighed. Wait... My eyes go wide. NONONONO I LEFT THE BLADE IN THE BATHROOM NONONONO! If I go back down and back into the bathroom they would be suspicious. I start freaking out. Then I remembered I left it in the corner of the shower where no one looks.

I calm down and just slowly slide down my bed. I feel so empty inside. I started to silently cry. Well, sob. I hear a very very very faint gasp but I just ignore it, thinking it's my head.

After sobbing, I got really hot so I changed into shorts. I don't  care if they see my bandages. I stand up and slip into bed with no emotion. Just emptiness.

Jungkook POV
After a hour or two since Hobi Hyungs gasp, we waiting till Y/n was asleep. "Go check on her now, we don't want her doing anything else." Namjoon Hyung said. We all stand up and quietly rush upstairs to her room. I open the door and see her just sleeping there.

I walk in and instantly grab her hand softly, I lift up the covers and see a bandage on each thigh. I get small tears in my eyes and lift up the bandages and see deep deep cuts. I'm glad that she is a heavy sleeper. I touch the scratches carefully and she flinched instantly. I removed my hands carefully. She turns to the side and sighs in her sleep.

I gently kissed her cheek, then her nose, then for head. I see her smile slightly. I smile a little and stand up and leave. I shut the door and look at my hyungs. I nod and they all sigh. " I'll talk to her tomorrow don't worry" I say. They all nod they leave to their rooms.

I go back inside Y/ns room and lay next to her. She turns to face me and she buries her face in my neck. I felt her soft breathe on my shirtless chest. She hugs me and I hug her back. She's still sleeping which is good.

"I love you.. Y/n. It hurts me to see you do this to yourself."

{Unedited}