A, You're Adorable (Klance) [DISCONTINUED]

Six: F is for First

I don't believe in love at first, second, third, or fourth sight. Keep walking.

"Taaaake ooooon meeee," Lance dramatically spun around into his seat.

"Take on me!" Pidge and Hunk chorused.

The force of Keith hitting his head against the table was enough to toss a clump of powdered sugar into the air and down again. Lance eventually slid his hand between Keith's forehead and the table so he stopped.

"It is too early for this," he grumbled, dumping three cubes of sugar into his coffee.

"It's eight in the morning, dude," Pidge passed him a waffle. "Get on our level."

Before Lance could take it, Keith topped his mug off with whipped cream. "Someone thought it was a good idea to stay up and listen to all the songs another time after the movie ended."

"How can such a salty person consume so much sugar?" Lance wondered aloud.

"Fight me, yobo," Keith mouthed into his coffee, but Lance deciphered it.

"Fine! I'll stop flirting when you stop flirting."

"You apologize first."

"Why should I apologize when you're the one-"

Hunk answered the phone. "Hello, Mrs. Kogane? Good morning. We're finishing up breakfast. Yeah, Keith had some coffee. Tell him to what now? Hold on. I'll put you on speaker so you can tell him yourself."

"Keith Kogane, you had better put down your coffee and your boyfriend so you can come home and finish your homework as soon as possible! You have to apply to college in case the Space Program doesn't accept you, you know! And you need to pull your grades up. I see that 89 in Physics. Go talk to Mr. Takashi and ask him if he offers any extra credit assignments. Did you sleep well? Did you wear the kigurumi? You know how much those cost, right? Don't waste your uncle's hard work! Wear it once in a while! There's nothing wrong with walking around in a onesie sometimes. Finish your breakfast and come home. If you finish your coffee because you're tired I'll ground you, you hear? You're too young to be drinking coffee! When you get home you can take a nap. Then do your homework and email Mr. Takashi, and then you can go out with your boyfriend if you want, but only after."

"Eomma," Keith groaned, "I finished my homework already. I can talk to Shiro later."

"Then are you and your boyfriend going to do something after breakfast, or should I pick you up?"

"He's not my boyfriend," Keith muttered, but his mother forced him to repeat himself because "future space pilots don't mumble". "I said, Lance is not my boyfriend. I don't have a boyfriend. I'll ride home myself. I have my bike, remember? I'll wear the sleepover kit or something."

"Okay. See you later. Thank you, Hunk."

"Even your mom thinks something is up," Pidge whistled. "You're in trouble."

The mug was Keith's only safe space in the room. He could drink and close his eyes to pretend like no one had been listening. Lance was a total airhead in class, so why should this situation be any different, right?

"What would she have done if you had told her I was your boyfriend?" Lance queried.

Darn it. "She probably would've freaked out and said something like, 'I'm so proud of you! You finally have a social life! Now I can stop worrying that I won't have any grandkids!'."

Keith's mother just wanted the best for her son, with added Asian Parent Expectations™. Apparently the best thing for Keith was to hook up with someone, get married, have kids (human kids, not cats), and settle down. At the moment, the best thing for Keith, in his opinion, was to launch himself into space so he would never have to see Lance and his stupid grin again.

"If you want, Miguel and I can take your kit and drop it off at your place so you don't have to ride with it."

"Sure. Just make sure Miguel doesn't say anything to my mom."

Miguel said something to Keith's mother. Lance started banging his head against his seat when his brother handed her the sleepover kit and added, "Do you think Keith and Lance think they're fooling us?"

"There's nothing going on between me and Keith!" Lance yelled from the car. "Nothing!"

It was at that moment that Keith drove up and parked his motorcycle. When he removed his helmet, he glared daggers at the McClain brothers. Eomma Kogane lifted her eyebrow.

"Thank you, Miguel," she took the sleepover kit with a sidelong glance at her son. Miguel nodded and drove off. Lance punched him in the arm.

"Keith, we need to talk."

"What is there to talk about?" Keith crossed his arms as he sat on the couch.

His mother had calmly accepted 13 years ago that she was not going to have a biological grandchild when five-year-old Keith had come home crying because he had thought a boy in his class was pretty. A grandchild was a grandchild, nevertheless, and she refused to get off his case about becoming approachable at the least. "Tell me about Lance."

"There's nothing to say about him. You've already known him for three years."

"Pretend I don't know anything about him. Talk. Introduce him to me."

Keith rolled his eyes, but it was either accept the intervention or lose his already-wavering motorcycle privileges. "Fine. This is my friend, Lance. He's tall and Cuban. His eyes are blue, as blue as dark denim, and his hair is chocolate brown. His birthday is July 28th.

"He likes to flirt with girls and tease me because he thinks I have no sense of humor. His hobbies are dealing memes, making puns, and joking. His favorite subject is lunch and his favorite color is blue. He has an older brother, an older sister, a younger brother, and a younger sister. Their names are Miguel, Alejandra, Ricardo, and Maria. His name isn't Cuban because his parents had an inside joke with their neighbor that their middle child would be named after a weapon.

"His skin is really soft because he bothers to exfoliate and wears a stupid-looking face mask to bed every Sunday night. He doesn't speak Spanish to us very often, even though Hunk is learning it, because he doesn't want to accidentally use colloquialisms that we don't learn in school. He's good at cheering people up and calming kids down. He wants to be married and have one child and a pet when he gets older, but first he wants to become a space pilot. If he doesn't make it to space, he still wants to pilot airplanes.

"At some point when he was a kid he liked to pretend to be Lance McClain from Voltron: Defender of the Universe because he found it funny that they had the same name but they were so different. He thinks my hair looks nice when it's in a ponytail.

"He always smiles at me when I pass him in the hallway. He sits right next to me at lunch even though there's a lot of room. I consider him to be my-"

Keith's mother held up her hand. "That's enough. Take a breath."

Only then did Keith realize he had barely paused during his description.

"Now, what was the last thing you were going to say?"

"I consider him to be my... my closest friend."

"Is that all?"

A half-lie wouldn't hurt. "Yes."

"Okay. You can go. Thank you for sharing this with me. I'm glad you have a close friend."

//

Image: Alejandra McClain; drawn 3 October 2017