The Rivals (Rewriting)

Shot-54

              

  ~Randhir's POV~

I was dead.

I was seriously and surely gone and done for.

Of course, I did try to maintain my usual composure in front of her in the morning; knowing well that she didn't remember anything from the night before. But my inner self only knew what a rollercoaster ride my heart was in the whole time.

What I did was beyond any kind of repentance. I didn't even have the courage to apologize to Sanyukta for that. Knowing that she'd eventually remember everything after washing off her hangover, I had tried to wrench off—probably the last— ray of blush she would get in my presence and the feeling of being with her.

I would have been lying if I said that I didn't have a tiny bit of my heart desperately hoping that Sanyukta would forgive me and come back to me. But I surely knew that it was impossible then.

You didn't have the guts to tell her about your true feelings.

You were a jerk, playing with her emotions all along.

You are unworthy of having decent friends.

You can't do one thing right.

You're just a selfish bastard who only thinks about his grades and career.

You deserve to stay alone.

You deserve to be hated.

I clutched my head in between my palms and thudded back onto the bed. I was such a mess then that probably not even the largest vaccum cleaner in the world could clean me and the muddle that I had caused.

But she didn't believe you.

She didn't even want to hear your side of the story.

She has her faith only in Rehan.

She didn't even acknowledge the fact that you were trying to defend her all these time.

She doesn't trust you.

She will hate  you for what you have done.

She HATES YOU!

"She.. She hates me.." I felt like someone had ripped my heart out when those words involuntarily left my mouth.

I closed my eyes and I could only see her— smiling at me, secretly blushing at my corny comments, practicing with me in her usual sarcastic demeanor and then that hurt expression on her face the other night when she told me about Rehan's state and how pathetic my attempt was to get back at him two years ago without even knowing anything. Right before I had tried to forcefully kiss her the other night.

That kiss was not in my intention at all. It was just that she supported Rehan blindly which agitated me. And that agitation led me to show her who she belonged to.

A year ago, I wouldn't have even bothered about her feelings for all these. I did what I thought would have been right at that moment. I wanted to hurt Rehan for hurting Sanyukta. But then, it was no surprise that I was whipped. I was whipped by Sanyukta Aggarwal, my ex-nemesis.

If only I knew.. If only.. I wouldn't have caused such a disaster if I had a single clue of the situation then. But.. I did what I felt was good. I did everything for her. Unknowingly, yeah but still, I hadn't known why I did what I did to Rehan. I didn't know that I liked Sanyukta back then. She was this annoying nerd who got into my path of winning every single time. She challenged me everytime and that triggered my self esteem so much that I couldn't even grasp  that I had developed a secret crush on her over the years.