Into Darkness and Beyond (Star Trek: Into Darkness Fanfiction - sequel to AKFAS)

Chapter 9

They limped back to the scene of the attack, Kirk's arm around Kez's shoulders. She was still shaking slightly as the adrenaline wore off, but she couldn't shake the feeling of dread in her stomach. Especially as they stepped over the first fallen body, covered in shattered glass. Kez gripped Kirk tight, steadying herself. If only she had managed to port more people from the room...

Her grief was interrupted by Kirk rushing from her side at the sight of something.

Kez followed him tentatively only to suddenly be gazing at the fallen and lifeless body of Christopher Pike. Spock looked at her tenderly as Kirk pressed two fingers to Pike's neck looking for a pulse that Kez didn't have the heart to tell him he wouldn't find.

He sobbed heavily, clutching at Pike's bloodstained uniform before composing himself. He stood up with a straight back and then moved away to look down upon the wreckage from the window.

Kez knelt by the body, holding Pike's hand as if to comfort him in his passing. Spock laid a hand on her shoulder and stayed there with her as the medical and relief teams arrived. She helped the medics get Pike onto a trolley, covering him with a blanket to provide him with the dignity and respect he deserved. They took him from sight, Kez feeling more and more empty inside as they did.

"Where's Jim?" She asked suddenly, wiping the tears from her face and looking around to see if she could spot him in the chaos.

"I do believe he has retired to his home quarters," Spock mumbled, looking straight-faced as ever, but Kez could see the hurt behind his eyes.

"He's not okay," She managed to say, remembering the heartbreak on his face and the way he wouldn't look at her as he had moved away from Pike's body.

"I believe in times like this, it is routine to offer emotional support to the person who is grieving," Spock said, looking into her eyes, "I believe this is your duty."

Kez nodded, pulling Spock into a rigid hug that she was sure he appreciated to some extent.

"I will be fine, Kestrel," He mumbled into her hair. She nodded and then departed, wiping fresh tears away.

She paused at the door of Jim's flat and sighed heavily. She tapped it lightly, staring at the grey paint morbidly. There was no answer.

"Jim? Can you open the door, please?...Jim?"

Still no answer and no noise of movement from inside the flat. She knew he was in there though.

She ported, despite knowing that it breached privacy.

She pressed her back to the door, looking into the apartment, down the hallway and into the open plan living space, one wall of which was a window looking out on the city, much like the one in the conference room. Kez shuddered thinking of all the imploding glass. 

It was a nice apartment, a good place to stay on the odd occasion that Kirk was grounded on Earth.

He was stood by the window, head pressed to the glass as if the coolness was soothing a headache. He was shirtless, wearing only his uniform trousers which were tattered in places from where smashed glass had slashed him. He had a thin cut to his left shoulder blade and his hair was slick with grime and sweat.

Kez moved soundlessly forwards until she was stood beside Kirk and looking out at the moving city below. Kirk's forehead was still pressed against the glass his eyes screwed up tight but Kez could see the trace marks of tears down his cheeks.

After a short while, he opened his eyes and glanced sideways at her, straightening up to face her.

"Jim ... look, I-," Kez began but he cut her off by shaking his head and pulling her towards him into a tight embrace. She could feel his chin pressing into her head as she rested against his chest, her eyes welling up. Pike had been more than a friend to them both.

That night as Kirk slept restlessly beside her, Kez stared at the ceiling watching the dark shadows play across the room and listening to the sound of Jim breathing. She couldn't get John Harrison's face from her mind, the way he had been staring at her. She couldn't help but feel that she knew him from somewhere. There was a feeling of familiarity to his face yet Kez knew she hadn't met or seen him in her life. The scars on the back of her neck hurt, burning as if they had just been branded there. She sat up on the edge of the bed, rubbing her neck. The heat transferred to her hand and came away wet with sweat.

Kirk had felt her move. He couldn't sleep himself but at the same time, he hadn't known how to make it not obvious to Kez just in case she could. He didn't want to wake her had she been able to sleep. But he'd watched her get up shakily and sit on the edge of the bed, her back to him. He looked to the side and watched silently as she touched the nine strikes on the back of her neck tenderly. He could tell something wasn't right by the way she tipped her head back and sighed like she had the whole world on her shoulders. Kirk shuffled to sit around her, his legs on either side of her body. She jumped slightly not realising he was there or even awake. He moved her hair away so he could get a better look at the marks then leaned in to kiss them softly. They seemed to be burning with an internal fire except Kez's pale skin was cold due to being exposed to the air.

"What's wrong?" He asked softly.

"I don't know. My mark just seems to be hurting since the..." she paused as if to protect Kirk against a flood of memories from earlier that night.

"We'll be okay." Was all he could respond with as he pulled her back into bed and against him. She fell asleep laid against his chest as he stroked her hair. Yet sleep didn't come as easily for him.