~sadness throughout~

three days

it's all surreal.
i get a relationship.
i'm happy.
i finally got a chance to live a better life.
i laughed more often.
i feel more loved.
i held someone's hand. romantically.
i went on a date.
in a span of three days?
yes.
but in this span,
i've also lost.
my best friend got into a relationship, and i already feel her drifting.
my other best friend is moving away, and he said he didn't even wanna stay for me. or his middle school friends.
it's all about high school.
i'm annoyed at my table.
i feel constantly left out.
i just want to have that perfect relationship.
but how can i have that?
am i supposed to fake happiness?
be more affectionate?
be open?
i don't know.
but the thing i do know.
a lot can happen in the span of three days.