Sick and Tired; Taeyong

•five•

___Myunha___
"Will you please give another shot for love, for me?" Taeyong stammered between his hitching breaths. I could tell he was a nervous wreck right now. But who wouldn't be if they're asking me. I felt as if it was a bit too early to ask me to fall into another trap of this confusing love that never seems to allow me to actually experience real love considering the fact that I've just gotten out of one. Although Taeyong has been really helpful for the past days for me. He did give me a lot of courage to go up and end the relationship for my own. I just don't know he may seem like a good guy and all, I just need to take upon a couple of measures on him to actually be sure of the decision I'll be making later on so I won't be heartbroken like I've been for the past months. Taeyong facial expression deepened as he was already assuming what I'd say.

"Can you give me some time to think about it? I'll need about a week. I'll need to know surely if  I'm making the right choice." I fiddled with my fingers. Taeyong's face lit up with hope as to having chance to achieve his goal. There was a silence hat barged itself in between us, rather it being awkward it was more of a calm and relaxed silence. Gazing at the beautiful scenery of the summer leaves and happy children playing at the playground a few feet away set the soothing aroma. "Myunha, how did you happen to fall in love with Dongwook?" He questioned inching closer to me on the bench. "Uhm, from what I remember I thought he was more unique from his very odd personality. I believed in the old saying how 'opposites attract' and I kind of felt the connection between us. His appearance looked stunning out of all the guys in the school at the moment since he's the only one who actually reached out to me and confessed to me first. Now that I see him now his personality makes him look disgusting. I regret ever falling in love." I sighed realizing my long lasting mistake. I could sense that Taeyong started to feel pity of me and this such situation and I honestly didn't want him to think that I won't be able to help myself out things like those.

"Was he your first?" He broke the silence fiddling with his pale fingers. How could helping someone out cause one to fall in love hard? I can't really seem to grasp onto how he just fell in love with me like that. He's probably just unsure of his feelings, after all of being around me for heck two weeks for the most. Wouldn't anyone not catch feelings just from helping one person constantly? The long silence draws him to assuming again with all sorts of questions as I've observed from his identifiable expression he gave. "Actually, he was my first boyfriend. Now that I think about it. Unlike all the other girls that would rot their brains with the thought of never trying love again, I won't be like that. Taeyong in thanks to helping me and wasting so much time for me, I'll give this another shot. Just this once for you." I confessed looking deeply in his solemn eyes that transition into more lustful and shocked dark brown eyes. His fingers that once played in unison with each other drifted towards my hand that laid palm down onto the bench breaking the distance between us two. My eyes quickly averted back and forth between his cold bare hands touching mine and his soft gaze that never left mine. His eyes only read nothing but "true love" that lead a smile to my face.
|||

The dark nights glow seeks through my rooms opened window letting in a cold but pleasant breeze as I sat on my bed with my back against the wall sternly. The only thought that seemed to swim freely around my mind was him. That gaze that suddenly drove me insane as it continues to play like a broken tape inside my head causing my already racing heart to go into overdrive. How could his non intentional heart thriving small actions get to me in such a way. His cold hand that touched mines quickly adapted to my warmth. His serious expression that I wished to see with every chance I could get. Maybe it's because I've already fell in love with you while with Dongwook, it can't be. Can it? Rather than to keep questioning my own self of my previous events, I walked over towards the open window that apparently screamed for me to walk over. Sitting on the flat lengthy cushion that aligned perfectly along the window. Glancing down I noticed a shadow walk their way towards my home. Who is that? I sit up properly as if I'd get a better glance at the person wearing a black hoodie that I don't seem to recognize from anywhere. Jumping off the windows shelf I raced to the front door and peeked through the small hole that zoomed in on his face. Before I could even question why he was here, my small hand wrapped gently around the silver door knob twisting it and pulling it wide open. "Taeyong, what are you doing here at... 12 in the morning?" I folded my arms to prevent any cold air from finding its way to cause goosebumps along my forearm. "I couldn't just seem to get you off my mind and, I thought if I seen you it'll ease the habit." He started making blood sluggishly rush the opposite direction where it was heading and create a slight tint of pink on my pale cheeks.

"Did it happen to ease it?" I asked curiously as he still stood there staring at me flabbergasted. "No, it only made it worse Myunha." He whispered ruffling his black fluffy hair that I really want to touch. If it's not weird of course. "How did it get worse?" I asked as my eyebrows knitted together. "Because it only makes me want you more and more, it makes me want to see you all the time, just a small interfere without you in my picture would seriously kill me inside, it makes me miss you even though I thought I wouldn't but I really do. Myunha what have you done to me?" He ranted unsure of how to express his true feelings without sounding too soft or aggressive. I felt at ease as I know he isn't the only one going crazy in the head of thinking about that one specific person.
___Myunha___