How to Make a Sandwich FOR MORONS

Prologue

Are you an imbecile? Are you so small-minded that you can't understand even the most generic instructions? People will ask you, "put the peanut butter on the sandwich," but you'll have no idea what they mean, so you simply place the brown cylinder on top of the bread slice. People will scold you for this so-called blunder when in truth it was simply an innocent mistake! When you bring them your result of a pile of ingredients in their containers, they assume you are too lazy to assemble a snack, when in actuality it was one of the most difficult things you could ever do! If this describes you, then please follow along closely, because this comprehensive, step-by-step instruction list is just for you!