You are almost there, and as your peers smell the concoction coming to completion, your incredible accomplishment will stand as a confirmation of your competence. All that remains to do is to assemble the sandwich and present it to its consumer:
1. Carefully line up the bread slices so that the edge of one slice matches with the edge of the other bread slice. The adjacent edges to the edges previously lined up from each bread slice should also converge to form what looks like a rectangular figure from a superior view.
2. Face the palms of both of your hands upward, lift the bread slices by the short edges of the latter rectangular figure with your fingers, slide your hands underneath each slice into your palms with your tips of middle fingers in contact, and rotate your hands upward with the tips of your middle fingers still in contact until the bread slices are in full contact with one another. Then release your hands from the bread slices. If the combined slices stand up, grab the edge of the sandwich and lower it so the tan matter shows on top once more.
3. Line up the edges of the bread slices by slightly sliding the slices across each other. The product of the two bread slices is the peanut-butter and jelly "sandwich".
4. Grab the knife in the previous fashion and locate the diagonal hypotenuse of the top face of the sandwich. Carefully grab the edges of the sandwich with one hand to hold the sandwich in place. With the two sides of the flattened end of the knife facing left and right, press it lining up into the hypotenuse, and reciprocate the knife across the hypotenuse while holding the sandwich with the other hand. The knife will break apart the sandwich along the hypotenuse into two pieces shaped like triangles. Continue reciprocating until the two pieces come completely apart. Release your hand that is holding the sandwich in place.
5. Pinch the top face of the stack of napkins with a few fingers from your remaining hand, and lift the spot at which you pinch until you see a single edge on the side of the individual napkin, besides all the other edges of the napkin that are not integrated, but rather are several edges in one.
6. Manipulate the napkin so that it lays flat contacting your hand face to face. Place the flattened end of the knife that your other hand is holding so that the flattened end of the knife lays face to face contacting the napkin, perpendicular to your fingers.
7. Enclose the knife in the napkin by clenching your hand tightly, folding the napkin over the knife. Slide the knife back and forth through your hand in the napkin to rub off the peanut-butter and jelly.
8. Once all the peanut-butter and jelly have been rubbed off the knife, return the knife to its original position on the table. Keeping the napkin that you used folded over, place it on the table behind the smooth, flattened plate.
9. Carefully rearrange the sandwich pieces so that they once again form a square shape.
10. Pinch the top face of the stack of napkins with a few fingers from one of your hands, and lift the spot at which you pinch until you see a single edge on the side of the individual napkin, besides all the other edges of the napkin that are not integrated, but rather are several edges in one. Make sure the napkin does not unfold. Do the same with your other hand.
11. For each hand, manipulate the napkins so that each lay flat contacting its respective hand face to face. Once again, make sure the napkins do not unfold.
12. Facing your palms upward, lift the edges of the sandwich with each hand under its napkin on opposing sides of the sandwich and slide each napkin on its hand under the sandwich halfway through so that the tips of your middle fingers touch. In so doing the napkins should be applied to the underside of the sandwich.
13. Carefully slide your hands out from under the napkins so that that the napkins remain under the sandwich. Then, lift the opposite edge of each napkin extending out from under the sandwich with each hand and fold them over the top of the sandwich with each hand so that the napkins slightly overlap each other on top of the sandwich.
14. Holding the overlapping napkin in place, grab the knife with your remaining hand and place it flat on top of the sandwich. Release both hands.
Now call your friends, because you finally completed the sandwich! If you enjoyed this instruction set, please see our other "How To" titles, such as:
How to Walk: Parts 1 & 2
How to Tie a Shoe
How to Take off Clothing
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How to Make a Sandwich FOR MORONS
HumorLearn how to make a sandwich! Fully comprehensive for even the smallest of minds.
