The Language I Spoke Yesterday

Picture Perfect SMILE

"Captain!" Penguin complained from his slumped position in the hard wooden chair. "Weis reorganized my tools.... Now I can't find anything..."

I smirked. My feet were on the table, hands behind my head, chair balanced on its back legs. The Polar Tang was fully alive with pirates laughing, bull shitting, and meandering through their daily routines. Shore leave was always a good time for them to stretch their legs and take a break from each other, but this is what I loved about being a pirate.

"Perhaps you should try to be more organized?" I suggested to the disgruntled engineer. "Weis-ya might just be on to something. Besides." I raised an eyebrow at him. "Aren't you supposed to be resting for the next three days?"

He groaned, head lolling. "I'm bored."

"Too bad." I closed both eyes, just listening to the chatter.

The calm didn't last long. Shachi burst into the room with wordless cry. Something crashed into the wall behind me. "CAPTAIN Andromeda'S GONNA KILL ME!"

I sighed as he dove for cover under my table. Andromeda stalked into the room. Her haki was calm, but that didn't seem to be a good indicator of her emotional state. Afterall, I had seen her kill one person and barely blink, and Weis had informed me of the cold stabbing of the marine who was simply 'in her way'. "Tomato-ya, what seems to be the problem?"

"There isn't one." I'm sure to most she would have sounded perfectly happy and cheerful, but I certainly recognized a sharp, threatening note barely concealed behind what I was sure was a bright, wide smile. "Shachi-kun was just about to give me the cameko he's got in his pocket."

Shachi shuddered. "She tried to stab me!"

"Aww, afraid of a little girl?" she giggled.

I sighed, cracking one eye. She looked exactly how I imagined. A warped smile with a glint in her dark eyes. A black stiletto, presumably matching the shoe behind me, was clutched in her right hand. "Andromeda-ya, what happened?"

"Ask him." She pointed the thin heel at the table. "I'm sure he'll be more than happy to share."

"Shachi-ya?"

He placed the mentioned Cameko on the table with a suspicious look at the tomato. "Sorry... Uh, I won't do it again."

"Damn right." Andromeda continued to grin as she swaggered over to the table. It was a bit unnerving, really. "I'll just take that..." She reached for the snail, but stopped when I held up a finger.

"What exactly happened between you?" I was really only curious in passing. Andromeda wasn't normally so... Murderous.

She sighed with a dramatic eye roll and put her shoe on her hip. "Apparently Shachi-kun doesn't have enough pictures of naked women, so he decided to take some of me."

My eye twitched, hand falling back to the table. "Sha-chi-ya."

He squeaked in response.

"Shachi!" Penguin scowled under the table.

Every person present shook their heads and mumbled dissent. Weis took it one step further. "I'll tie 'im down if you want target practice!"

Seeing that I wasn't going to stop her, Andromeda snatched up the cameko and turned on her heel. She stormed out without another word, leaving Shachi to deal with his fate.

The engineer in question quivered under the table, but the look on my face drove his crew mates out of the cafeteria. Ever so slowly he took Penguin's place next to me. He clasped his hands in his lap, head down.