Hogwarts School of Prayer and Miracles Sequel

Chapter Sixteen: WTF HARRY?!

A/N: So, it's been a while, but here's a new chapter! Enjoy!

"I can't believe this!" Ron shouted as soon as the three were far enough away from the Reverend's office. "Why would you do that, Harry?!"

"I'm doing what is right, Ron!"

"Harry, we weren't hurting anyone or anything like that!" Hermione yelled.

"Oh yeah? But what if you decide to... I don't even want to think about it!"

"Decide to what?"

"Were you going to say fornicate?" Ron asked.

"N-no, of course not. I was going to say fornicate, and like it, and start to do it with everyone!"

"Harry, that's not going to happen," Hermione said.

"Oh yeah? Well, what about that rumor going around?"

"What rumor?"

"The one that says you're gay! Everyone knows that leads to promiscuity!"

"What?! I'm not gay!"

"Everyone else thinks you're gay."

"What? Why?!"

"I may or may not have told Lavender and Parvati and paid them to spread it around the school. They were pretty hard to convince, but they came through."

"What?! Why would you do that?"

"You refused to love me. I had no other choice."

"That's no excuse!" Hermione shouted angrily. "How could you do something like that?!"

"Hermione's right," Ron added. "A truly good person would never resort to ruining someone's reputation with lies."

"Well, it's not a lie! The Hufflepuffs turned you gay and you just don't know it!"

"Harry, for the last time, stop picking on the Hufflepuffs just because you don't have an argument!" Hermione said. "Come on, Ron. I have to go set the record straight with everyone."

Ron and Hermione went to the Gryffindor Common room and found Lavender and Parvati.

"Lavender, Parvati, we need to talk," Hermione said.

"Oh, of course. Hermione, we're both dreadfully sorry about what happened. It's just that Harry was blackmailing us and-"

"Blackmailing you?" Ron repeated.

Parvati nodded. "He said he would spread a rumour about us being gay with each other if we didn't help him."

"What?" Hermione said in disbelief.

"That's insane," Ron said. "Shouldn't you report that to the Reverend?"

"You know Harry," Lavender said. "He's like oxygen. He's everywhere."

"And just what are you four talking about?" The four turned to see Harry, as if Lavender's words summoned him.

"Told you."

"We're talking about how rude it was to spread the false claim that Hermione's gay," Ron said, glaring at him. "Also, blackmailing? Really? What happened to being a good person?"

"Look, in order to stay on the top of the food chain here, you don't need morals or ethics. You just have to get as much information on everyone as you can, and use it to your advantage."

"So, in order for you to be on top, you have to drag everyone down? That's completely ruthless!" Hermione exclaimed.

"Not to mention, totally against Christian values!" Ron added.

"Well, Ronald, in case you haven't noticed, Christians can't exactly agree on objective morality, so who's to say that what I did was against Christian principles?"

"You're impossible," Hermione said.

"Your opinion," Harry said as he walked away.

"Please," Lavender said. "It's an objective fact."

"I have to agree with Lavender on that one," Ron said.

"Hmph," Harry walked away.