Edges of the World

Chapter 17

Leia's head spun as she left the meeting. She had not anticipated that she'd see combat so soon.

Before yesterday, she had never considered being in combat at all.

Already there were announcements blaring across the base, ordering all units to report to the main briefing room.

Leia followed after General Madine (he had insisted she call him Crix. She didn't feel comfortable doing so), unsure what she was supposed to do.

Alliance High Command had expressed that they wanted her to pretend to be her counterpart to the Alliance at large, since they feared there may be a drop in morale if the soldiers learned the Princess had been replaced by an identical stranger.

She could of course explain who she was to the individuals she worked closely with, but it would be a headache to clarify these circumstances on a mass scale. She had objected at first; she did not want to maintain an act like that, but the Council was adamant. Apparently her counterpart was a major public figure, and announcing that she was missing would be a major blow to the Rebel forces. Command wanted to avoid that if they could.

Leia knew this meant the troops would be looking to her to be the person in charge. Not only of whatever group came with her to the planet's surface, but in the prep before battle as well.

Leia wasn't sure how long she'd be able to pretend to be her counterpart. She didn't want to pretend to be her counterpart. She understood why it was needed, why what had happened should not be broadcast to everyone, but how could she pretend to be a person she had never met?

They entered what had to be the main meeting room for this slapdash base.

A handful of soldiers were already there. They had been milling about and chatting, the rise and fall of their voices comfortable and friendly, but they all fell silent and took seats as the two of them entered the room.

The room, like most parts of this base, was a temporary structure of cloth and tent poles. There was a collection of folding chairs facing a screen, which was currently displaying parts of the very battle plan she had recommended earlier in the meeting.

They were using the battle plan Leia had approved.

Her mind kept returning to that fact, through all the time spent briefing the troops and getting everything combat ready – they were using the aerial strategy she had recommended.

Anyone who died today – anyone at all – their blood would be on her hands.

She felt sick.

She remembered, suddenly, the letters home to the families of dead soldiers her counterpart had on her datapad. How painstakingly personal each and every one of them had been.

How many of the dead did her counterpart feel responsible for? Did it ever get easier?

And Luke, Luke was going to be out there in the thick of it all! If something were to happen to him, she would never be able to forgive herself.

She knew the Jedi Code said, even with its amendments for attachment, that valuing one life over others was wrong. Every life had to be held as equally valuable; all life was connected to the Living Force and needed to be given equal weight. Yet Luke had always been more valuable to her than anyone else could ever hope to be.

Even if this boy wasn't actually her brother, just a version of him from another universe entirely, he still was the being she cared about the most.

She reminded herself, not for the first time in her life and not for the last, that it was not contradictory to both value her brother above all others, and value all beings. If need be, she could make herself understand that if it ever came down to Luke's life against the needs of the many, her brother couldn't ever be her choice. She just hoped she never would have to make that choice.