Not Your Luna--The Broken Bond (book 1 COMPLETED)

Chapter 34

May 17, 2020 edited

Not perfect but better....No plot changes

JENSON'S POV

After what I did yesterday I haven't been home. I hated what I said to her at dinner. I hated how I have been treating her. I hated the fact I was disappointing my dad. But what choice did I have? None really. Sure I have always said I never wanted a mate. I was being naive and I knew that but I promised myself when I found that right she-wolf than I would make her my Luna. The only reason I would take on a Luna in the first place was for the pack and not for me. I didn't want the committed relationship or the responsibility. I wanted to be free to do what I wanted and who I wanted. I needed someone like my mom. Someone who was strong and who did not need a male to support her but would always support her mate. I needed a Luna who would take care of the pack. Who put the pack before her own personal needs. I wanted someone who I wasn't bonded to. I needed someone who was the opposite of her.

I was a fool to think I could reject the one who was fated to be my mate. I had never felt anything so strong before. Not even an hour after I came home after being away for a couple weeks I had walked into a shit show. People were yelling. Our Beta was beside himself and it was all over some human girl that had just moved in. Really a fucking human in the middle of a pack house?! What on earth was my dad thinking?

That hour I watched with amusement after I realized that not only were they missing someone but they couldn't even track down a human girl. I would have been more ashamed for my pack if I didn't find the humour in it. Well all that changed when I heard Tony screaming at someone. It was something I had never heard before. Oh he was far from being all smiles and rainbows but never screamed. He was more reserved, he watched everything around him and didn't get too personally involved with many pack members. He deserved the head warrior title. The man was a force to be reckoned with. But he always trained with a more or less level head and voice. Sure he got pissed but growled more than yelled. So when I heard him screaming I had to see what was going on. I had to know who was the person who got under the skin of our warrior.

Standing at the door I watched everything unfold in front of me. There up against the wall was a girl of average height with warm gold brown hair. I could tell she was in great shape and I could also tell this was the human that everyone was in an up roar about. I watched silently as I saw her anger grow. I watched as she stared down not just our head warrior but also our Beta all with no fear. I saw her flinch once but I was so mesmerized by her I did know what was said.

When she took a step towards the Beta I thought that was it and he was going to kill her right then and now. No one and I mean no one disrespected Thomas. Instead she looked around and that was when I saw her eyes. The most amazing blue eyes that I had ever seen. They were like pools of water that I found myself drowning in. When I heard her say she was leaving that snapped something in me which helped me out of my stupor. That was when I spoke up. That was when everyone looked at me. That was when I knew what she was and just how screwed I was.

It was in my dad's office a little after that scene that I found out who she was and the trouble she was in. I also found out my mate was the opposite of what I wanted. What I needed. And to top all that off was the fact if she even survived the transition she was most likely to be feral. The outcome was her death no matter how you looked at it. I was angry at the goddess for allowing this to happen. I was hurt because the one chosen for me was going to die in pain either through the initial shift or by our hands. I was devastated that I could not allow myself to get close to her for all the reasons above. That night I took off and did a lot of thinking. I knew I had to reject her. Now if it was only that easy.

I fought constantly with my wolf about this. Since he would never let the words come out of my mouth I did something else to weaken him. Sex. I had sex with the girls that fell at my feet. The ones that would do anything to be my Luna. Oh I knew they never had a chance in hell but I never told them that. At first I felt bad about using them. I felt worse with the way I took the girls away from my friends. Especially Nick. I knew he didn't really care and screwed around more with the girls than would actually have sex with them. He was no saint but his morals were a lot greater than mine especially lately.

I knew he was pulling away from me and getting closer to her and I was pissed about it. I was mad that it was him that she talked to the odd time. I was pissed that he was able to feel her skin. I was furious with myself that all of it was my own fault but I had to do what was right for the pack. I had to do what I needed to do to survive. I saw how Tony was after he lost his mate. It changed him. It almost damn near killed him. Dammit I respected the shit out of that wolf seeing what he went through and how he fought.

I tried to talk to my father earlier but he wanted nothing to do with it. I didn't blame him at all. I didn't want to talk to myself. I was a disgrace and didn't deserve to become alpha. I was the weak one not her. I was so confused and couldn't think straight. I had left in a fit of rage after my father told me to get out of his office. Mad at myself, not him. I stormed out of the pack house and was about to go for a run when I heard the music. I knew it was her. No one else had ever listened to music that loud. More because our ears were a lot more sensitive than a human's.

I swear I was going to ignore it and head right for the woods to shift and let out my aggression with a long run and a hunt or two. That was the concrete plan, well until I saw Nick stiffen beside me. I could feel his need to go to her. I clenched my fists and forced my feet forward. Trying to ignore the music and thumps as she repeatedly hit that damn punching bag. I almost made it till I saw Tony storm in there. That was when my feet had a mind of their own. Sure I respected Tony a hell of a lot but I also started to hate him. It was his relationship he had with her that made me see red. It was my jealousy, hurt and anger.

My rage was in full force that I didn't make out what Tony had said before I stormed into the training center. I wasn't sure what I even said or why I said it but as soon as I saw her bruises everything I had just felt was gone. I knew right then what they were from and it sickened me. I never thought it would happen to her. She wasn't one of us, not really. Not yet. I couldn't fathom what she went through all those times I had slept with those girls, the pain she endured. I was going to be sick.

Of course that was when my cousin seemed to have the need to get involved. When he touched her I lost it. "GET YOU HANDS OFF OF WHAT IS MINE!" There was no stopping me. I just claimed Mac as mine and there was no turning back. Everything just went from shit to colosal.

That was when Tony started to yell at me. He knew. He knew what I did and demanded me tell her but I just couldn't. Then my cousin felt the need to confirm it all. Tony and I stared each other down. It took everything I had to keep my feet planted where they were. It wasn't just my wolf that wanted Corey away from my mate. As the seconds counted down the tension was growing. The air was getting hot and thick. One of us was about to lose it. I just wasn't sure who would be the first.

"One of you tell me what the fuck is going on! NOW!" I guess that answered my questions. It was Mac.