Lovers come and lovers go.

I

When he came through that door, I knew him already. From school, my sisters descriptions, and stories. He was some kind of friend of hers.

I have to admit, I kept an eye on him all evening. I can't explain to myself, why he suddenly had almost all of my attention. Maybe because of the furtively looks he gave me. Like how our eyes met from time to time, I smiled kindly and looked away, like I was distracted by something else. Maybe it was his good looking, that attracted me. Or maybe the silent  conversations we had through our eyes. Maybe also, because I've heard so much about him.

I acted like I just looked accidentally on him,  but every time, l hoped he would look back at me. And he did. He did it and smiled and I felt special.

Even when I looked him in the eyes, when we talked, I couldn't remind his eye color. Because to me it was more important what he said, what he talked about, than paying attention on details. But I think it was green.

When he was gone, I asked myself where he went. Multiple times that evening all of the sudden he disappeared. Until the moment we talked again. But this time he was drunk. He was close to me, closer than all the other times before and I looked up to him and somehow I felt different.

I've had heard he had a lot of female friends. Only friends. But I thought about it anyways. All evening long.

I'd knew him before, but suddenly he became important to me. More important than he should have ever become.

~~~

He left. He didn't have to, but he also didn't want to stay any longer. I didn't mean enough to him, that he would stay just because of me.

But we texted. A lot. He wanted to see me again, soon. His feelings weren't obvious, neither were mine.

I talked myself into thinking, that I just wanted to be friends with him, I wouldn't care, if  there wouldn't turn out anything I wished would turn out in first place. But an old acquaintance is also not the kind of person I wanted to be.

I felt for him in the shortest amount of time. It didn't even took me a thought.

It just happened.

And shit happens.