Love You Long Time (Duncan Keith)

27| See Through

Alyssa

Since both of my friends just announced they were having a baby this year, I decided to throw them a joint baby shower. It was easier for the Blackhawks this way because finding two open dates in this compact schedule is impossible. So we were just going to have one big one at my place since it was big enough and much cheaper this way. Plus I loved organizing these things and they were my best friends after all.

Since it was the middle of April now Dayna was about four months along and Abby about five. We knew that Dayna was having a boy and Abby was having another girl. So that gave me enough info to figure out how to decorate the apartment and set everything up.

I drop Mogali off at Duncan's place because no matter what she thinks she is not good at helping to decorate. But she is more than welcomed to stay back and help tear it down when it's all said and done.

I decided to mix up the decorations since it was for a boy and a girl and try not to do pink and blue things. I get a bunch of silver and white decorations and decide to use those instead. I get silver balloons that spell out "congrats" for them both to use. And of course I got "It's a boy" and "it's a girl" banners for them personally.

I get a bunch of candy and finger foods and line them up on the island. I also get both he normal alcoholic and mommy to be non-alcoholic drinks and put them in baby bottles because for some reason they thought it was a good idea for me to throw the team baby shower.

After about two hours of me running around the apartment putting up signs and streamers and somehow build a table for presents, I was ready.

By one everyone was in the apartment and eating or drinking. My two pregnant best friends looked so beautiful and I was so happy for them. Abby and Sharpy was on their second child and this would be Dayna and Brent's first. But regardless they were both so excited and I'm happy I could be a part of this.

"Thank you so much for doing this for us, it means the world to me. It's hard to believe I was able to get by without you for two years" Abby laughs.

"It's my pleasure. I had so much fun setting all of this up and I hope we get some amazing pictures because there's so many great people here to support  you" I insist.

"When are you going to have a party like this of your own" she questions and I laugh.

"I don't know. I'm almost thirty. I feel like I'm so behind in all of this" I admit.

"I don't think that matters. I think you're already a awesome mom and would do great raising your own kid" she claims.

"I can barley take care of myself" I insist.

"You don't need to. That's what a husband is for. He takes care of you then you take care of a baby" she explains.

"I can't rely on another guy" I insist.

"You don't rely on Michael" she asks.

"Not really" I admit. "I mean I don't need his money but he loves to spend it on me. I don't need his attention half as much as he feels like he needs mine. In fact the only thing I need him for is sex" I admit.

"And even then" she jokes.

"But I love him. I really do" I defend.

"I'm sorry, but I still don't believe you" she claims.

"Why is that so hard to believe" I question.

"Because you don't look at him like you used to look at Duncan" she claims and I stand down. I would argue but she wasn't lying. "I watched you for four years fall so in love with a man that you could be at a hockey game and all you could see was him. Not the 22,000 other people there. You loved him so much that nothing else in this entire world mattered to you.

And you guys couldn't live without each other. If it was him it was you, like two peas in the pod. You couldn't eat or sleep without him. You wrote the most beautiful songs because your love was so hard and so true.

So you saying that you don't need Michael tells me enough. I'm not even sure if you want him anymore. From what I've seen in the way you look at Duncan, it's still the same way now as it was before" she claims.

I look across the room and see that Duncan was staring at me. I smile at him and he smiles back as we stand there.

"It's not that easy for me to simply admit things like that. I know they're happening, but to say out loud the reality of my situation, I can't do it" I admit.

"You're scared. I get it. If I was in your situation I wouldn't know what to do either. All I know that if this was me and Patrick, I would do anything to have him back. No matter what he did to hurt me I know that Patrick is not a bad guy and the good parts of him are what makes him him.

Duncan is not a giant mistake and he shouldn't be defined by one. Even if it's a mistake he made a few too many times. He learned his lesson, you know he's changed. But he's still the guy that you were so in love with that you became so blind to what was happening. And now you're both wiser but still in love. Even if you're not allowing yourself to say it, you're showing it" she insists.

"I was afraid of that" I mumble.

"No matter what happens I just want to continue being your friend" she insists.

"Of course. Best friends" I smile.

"Best friends" she smiles back.

We get to the fun part of the party and open gifts. They go at the same time because they didn't want it to be awkward and everyone watching one person go at a time. So they open the presents one by one and thank everyone personally. I wrote down who gets what from who so they can make thank you cards later.

By four the party was all but over and it was time to clean up. I pick up garbage and stuff it in the bag I had set out. It took about a hour for clean up but it was well worth it for two of my favorite girls in the whole world.

Eventually Duncan comes back to drop off my dog. She had gone out to get groomed in our time away from each other and she looked so nice. They even gave her a pink bow which she despised but I thought it was adorable.

"Thanks for all your help" I tell Duncan. "I couldn't have done it without you."

"Well you did pretty amazing yourself. Everyone was talking about how great this party was and how they had such a good time" he claims.

"Well I'm glad to hear it" I smile.

I send him on his way and let out a long sigh as soon as the door closed. I was trying so hard to cover up my feelings but I didn't know it was so transparent. And I feel like Duncan was the one who would be able to see right through me.