Drunk Eyes & Sober Hands // Jesse Rutherford & Zach Abels

☾Cologne☽

"I SAID I WOULD STAY AWAY BUT I CAME HOME WITH MY CLOTHES DRAPED IN HIS COLOGNE."

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"Damnit Zach!" I screeched, clutching the controller, shaking it, thinking it was going to get me to kill his video game character faster.

"Oh no, not this time Lyssa." He remarked before he shot my character down faster than I could even curse at his tiny little face. I slumped on the couch and threw the controller softly onto the table. I turned to the side so my back was facing him and I was facing the cushions.

"You're lucky I suck at this because if I didn't, I'd kick your ass." I mumbled at him. He threw his head back in laughter and looked at me.

"Pretty sure your ass.." He got up and walked over to me and lightly kicked my butt with his foot. ".. is already kicked." I flinched under his touch and quickly tried to grab his leg, which happened to be a success. I tugged on it slightly, causing him to slip onto the floor next to me. I started to laugh really hard to the point where I was snorting. Which made Zach start to non stop laugh.

"Lyssa." I heard someone call to me. I recognized it, Jesse of course. "Can I.. uh.. talk to you? Just for a little." I turned towards him, noticing a hint of jealousy for some reason. He was hiding glares at me and Zach, taking in that both of us were holding onto each other, crying of laughter. Was he jealous? Or was he weirded out by how much of a dumbass we both looked? Who knows. But that was what me and Zach were anyways, two of the closest friends that like to kick each others asses.

"Yeah. Of course." I said, straightening myself up as I made my way over to him, making sure not trip over Zach or the rug of his living room. I took one last glance at Zach to see him making a "be careful" look at me. I laughed and shrugged it off. But I was scared to be honest. Jesse was so unpredictable. We entered his room, and sat down on his bed. I still remembered the scent of his room so well, the way he always hated to change his air fresheners because they gave him a headache. But we both knew all along that it was because of how much cologne he drenched on himself everyday. He accused me of being wrong, but I always won that argument because every time I would leave his house, my clothes reaked of him. I snapped out of my thoughts and mentally slapped myself. Well fuck, I already thought this through yesterday and boy was that a fun time.

"I remember when we were like that." Jesse said, out of the blue. He looked down at his fingers and crossed them over each other, if not mistaken, he was shaking a little bit.

"Like what?" I questioned, unlike him, looking at him directly to see every tiny body language he had to offer. But he still refused to even glance at me.

"You and Zach." He answered, almost so faintly that I couldn't hear him. Its almost like that was some sort of struggle for him to say.

"Why... why are you telling me this?" I managed to build up the courage to ask. Because seriously, I was getting anxiously scared to know what he was stalling up to tell me. He didn't answer me this time, I mean not counting that he just shook his head at the ground.

"Why do you look at him like that?" He asked me, ignoring my question. But he finally tilted his head to look at me, and deep into my eyes.

"Jesse, what the hell are you talking about?" I gripped the sheets behind me to stabilize me since I was about to explode with all the thoughts running through my mind, which fyi, was all of what I predicted to be what he was jealous of. Or even if he was at all.

"You know damn well what I'm talking about. You think I don't notice the way you two act around each other? I see you guys almost everyday!" He exclaimed, storming up, and standing up in front of me. I slightly nudged back a little, knowing how Jesse was when he gets outbursts.

"What do you expect us to be like? Are we supposed to be giving the silent treatment? Are we supposed to act like we don't know each other? We're best friends, Jesse." I snapped back at him, making sure my point was clearly proven.

"Then why is it tearing me apart?!" Jesse screamed, pounding his fist against the table, making the single glass of water fall to the ground, breaking in pieces. I stared at him, completely in shock. This is why I wanted to stay away. This is why I should have. This always happened. This is part of it. Of why we couldn't even try to be friends after we broke up. And I'm always so afraid that all this work that was put into becoming friends again, that it might fail and he'd be gone again. I just cant help myself. He was inevitable and I hated it. I got up and walked over behind him. He was gripping the table with so much force, he might crack it any moment. Next thing I know, he had me pinned up against the wall, his arms leaning over me, caging me in. His face close to mine, his lips grazing over my cheeks. I shut my eyes and breathed harder after every tease he did until he grazed on my lips.

"Jesse, stop! You have a fucking girlfriend!" I yelled at him, slipping away from his grasp. He stopped in his tracks and stared at me for a long time until he threw his face into the crook of his arms. The growing silence echoing through the room only meant that he was thinking everything through. Just as I was too. Jesse... He's been dating Anabel Englund for a while now, since we broke up. And we were both on good terms so I had to suck it up and try my best to not let it bother me. But I guess that made me linger for love, now that the boy I loved was reserved. I didn't expect much, I wanted it to naturally happen. And that's when I became closer to Zach. Which Jesse fucking hated. Even though... he knew. Jesse and I are over and done with. We've always been. But what was sad was that I thought he was inevitable. And it just so seems that he thinks I am too.