Love Yourself: Him

P P

 His shift is bland like it usually is. He doesn't do anything different, doesn't bat a wayward eye when his boss scolds him about his lateness. Doesn't argue when they shove him into backroom work, doesn't think anything of the eyes staring at him.

"...Hey," someone says, and Jeongguk blinks one long blink before he looks to his left to see someone with a silver coloured mop of hair and a nametag that reads 'Junsung' in Sharpie. "You okay? I...heard him yelling at you. Again." Jeongguk doesn't even respond, no hum of acknowledgement. Just looks away and continues to stack boxes. "...You look better. Like...your hair. It looks nice."

Jeongguk unconsciously brings a hand up to run fingers through his hair and feels the grease slide across his palm. The last time it had been washed was when Jimin washed it. He hadn't done anything.

He shrugs and keeps working, and Junsung ignores him. He thinks he'd appreciate him more if he could care. Junsung is the only coworker to indulge him, even when he doesn't get an answer.

Jeongguk got so fucked up in the head in the small amount of time he's known Junsung that there had been no time to make a real connection. And not much more, as Junsung would be leaving for America once more.

The one nice person Jeongguk has and he's leaving. And Jeongguk is...angry? Upset? Heartbroken? Or is he just...bland still?

When's the last time he actually thought about anything?

When work ends, he feels his phone buzz, and eyes five new messages from five different people.

from unknown number

Hi, this is Suga. Missed you when you left, RM says you're coming back tho today! Also, you can call me Yoongi if you wanna : P

from unknown number

tis v at your service! i'm coming to get you i guess at six? hope we can play games when you come back over : DDDDDD

from unknown number

hey, this is seokjin, or jin for short! you seem cool, hoping to see you again today yea?

from unknown number

Hello, this is Dr. Park Jimin with a prescription of Fun for you! I hope your leg is doing much better and that you're feeling well. And Hobi (Hoseok) says, "Hello, Jeongguk-ssi."

from unknown number

so i gave everyone your number earlier. so theyll probably all text you at once lmao. you dont have to respond to them dont worry, but v'll get you after work still : O

Jeongguk stares at his phone before he goes to Namjoon's number.

to unknown number

o kay

It's all he can muster up to type, and not even a second later, his phone chimes again.

from unknown number

great! we're all excited to hang w you again : D

There's nothing for a few moments until his phone goes off with four notifications a moment later.

from unknown

Hey, no fair!! You text RM back but not your Suga????

That's so mean QnQ

I'm hoarding you when you get here! >: D

In all honesty, I'm totally kidding, just to make sure, I just rly wanna hang out <3

Jeongguk waits, waits for something to react in him, but nothing goes off. Not even a facial expression.

Nothing.

He saves each number in his phone accordingly, misspelling the names but not finding it in him to correct them. As he's walking out of the store, he collides with someone else.

"Hey!" someone shouts, and he waits to be screamed at. "It's me, V!"

Oh.

"Remember, RM told me to come get you, right?" Jeongguk manages a nod. "Nice to properly meet you, then. Kim Taehyung, also known as V. Call me whatever you want. And you go by...," Taehyung glances at Jeongguk's nametag still attached to his shirt, "Jeongguk. Cool." He holds out his hand, but Jeongguk doesn't shake it. Just stares. "Uh... Okay, then, whatever. I tend to get turned around, so I'm surprised I even found the store." Taehyung gives a smile too bright for Jeongguk to process and scratches the back of his head. "Guess we should start walking, huh?"

Jeongguk doesn't care.

The thing Jeongguk quickly notices about Taehyung is that he talks a lot, and leaves no room for response. It's a benefit for people like Jeongguk who don't ever talk, and all he has to muster is a grunt to show he's pretending to listen.

"...anyways, Jimin's been busting Jin-hyung's butt trying to get him to dance," Taehyung continues on, "but all hyung wants to do is sing and everything. And he even thinks he's a bad singer, but it's so not true." There's a pause and Jeongguk grunts automatically. "Even though I know you're not really listening, I'm glad you're just letting me talk. No one else even pretends to listen to me, so that's pretty cool of you."

The fact that Taehyung even says it out loud actually makes Jeongguk trip over his feet for a second. For a moment, he feels guilty that something he's done wrong has actually been pointed out to him, but the feeling passes as soon as it's there, and he continues walking.

The moment they enter the house, Suga - Yoongi - cheers and waves.

"Hello, Jeonggukie!" he says happily, the positivity leaving a strange taste in Jeongguk's mouth. Like not drinking milk for a long time and then drinking a whole glass. "It's nice to see you again, I've been waiting forever-"

"Yoongi-ssi," Hoseok says, straight-faced and with a level tone, "leave the kid alone." Hoseok seems to chance a glance at Jeongguk, his eyes resonating a certain...understanding.

With what Jeongguk knows of him now, due to Jimin, he has a feeling Hoseok might know how he's feeling. Or rather, how his feelings are lacking. Hoseok's been through it before, still goes through it, and Jeongguk knows. He sees that lack in his eyes.

It's like a mirror.

"Are you telepathically talking to each other?" Yoongi questions, and Hoseok finally turns back to his book.

"Yoongi-hyung, stop," Taehyung speaks, then shakes Jeongguk's shoulder. "Hey, let's play that game on the TV, I bet you'll love it. I'll teach you."

Without warning, Taehyung sits him down and takes the empty spot to his left on the floor, tossing a controller to him. He's seen it before, on papers and billboards. Isn't sure what each button does, barely listens to Taehyung's explanation.

Regardless, he beats him four times in a row. The only thing he doesn't do is feel like he's won. If anything, he just feels exhausted.

"How are you so good at this?" Taehyung mumbles as they start their fifth match, and the controller falls out of Jeongguk's hands as he stands up. "Jeongguk-"

"Let him go," Hoseok says. Taehyung presses his lips into a tight line and nods, switching the game to single player.

"Hey, Jeonggukie," Yoongi calls, and Jeongguk looks his way. "You really are good at that game. No one's beaten Taehyung for weeks now except Jin-hyung. That's an achievement."

Jeongguk leaves without saying another word.