The Inevitable

Chapter 6 Too Late to Apologize

Edward closed his eyes tightly. "Am I seeing things Alice?" he asked in a low, even tone.

"Wh…what?"

"Am I seeing things? Am I going crazy?"

"If you are, then the rest of us are right there with you," she murmured.

He opened his eyes again and stared back into hers; her golden eyes that were wide and anxious.

Bella. Bella was here. Bella was sitting at a table right in front of him. He was staring right at her. He knew this couldn't be real.

But oh, how he wanted it to be. Bella. His Bella. His perfect, beautiful everything. He took a deep breath, continuing to stare. She didn't move a muscle.

He just looked at her face, taking everything in. He could smell her. The same essential smell, only it didn't bring out in him what it used to. There was no longing for her blood; only for her. He felt like his entire being was opening up, after being closed for so long.

She stared back. A hard, cold stare. Surprised; but nothing else. She was Bella. But not the same Bella. There was no openness, no…emotion. The one thing Bella had always been full of was completely absent from her beautiful, delicate features.

"Bella?" Alice finally said quietly, advancing toward her.

Bella jumped up and darted from the room.

Bella sat at her table, spinning the cap of the bottle mindlessly, losing herself in yet more memories. Memories brought on by being in this place. It was amazing how fresh they all felt, like they had been only yesterday.

"Holy shit," she heard someone mutter. Her head darted up.

And her whole world, whatever that may be, crashed around her. She stared at the five people in front of her. The five people she had never expected to see again.

Funny how it had never crossed her mind that she might see them in Forks. That was the first thought that entered her mind. Not an irrational one, but certainly not the first she expected.

That thought was soon gone though. Because she was staring right into his eyes. Edward; the one thing that had consumed her thoughts for all these years was standing right in front of her, staring wide eyed. And she wished, she begged, that this was not real. That this was not happening.

Because she couldn't handle it. She wanted to close her eyes and make them all go away. But she knew that this was real. In every memory she had ever dredged up over all these years there wasn't half the intensity there was between them here, when they were just a few yards away from each other.

And it surprised her that, while his face was of course shocked, there was something else there. Happiness, relief; release.

And while maybe she felt some kind of release at seeing him after all these years, there was no happiness. She just didn't have that in her. Not anymore. She remained impassive as ever.

"Bella," she heard Alice say quietly as she began coming closer.

And all Bella knew to do was run. She jumped up and darted too quickly out of the cafeteria. And she went to the only place that seemed rational.

Class. If she ran anywhere else she was sure they would follow her. At least here she knew there would be no scene. They couldn't confront her here.

She got her slip signed and sat where she was told, one of the first to arrive in the class. She watched the door like a hawk praying that none of them would walk through it.

Of course, because that's what she wanted most of all, there was no way it was going to happen, and it was only a few minutes before she saw Alice walk through the door. Her eyes immediately went to Bella and she looked away.

Alice took a seat a few rows in front of her and remained facing forward. Bella stared at a spot on the wall the entire period, not wanting to chance meeting Alice's gaze should she turn back. When the bell rang she just sat in her seat, unmoving.

And so did Alice. Bella sat there for as long as she was able to. But soon the classroom started filling with people from the next period. She stood slowly and, glancing quickly at Alice, darted as fast as she dared out of the room.

She was looking behind her to see if Alice was following. So it wasn't too surprising when she ran into someone full force. And she closed her eyes tightly as she turned forward, already telling herself not to be surprised at who it would be.

She stared up into Emmett's face. And saw everyone behind him, Edward of course being the closest. She stepped back quickly and whirled around, only to find herself face to face with Alice.

"Oh Bella," she murmured quietly.

"I'm late for class," she said grimly and darted around Alice.

Just then she felt someone grab her arm. No, not someone. It was him. No one else's touch could have had that effect. It felt like electricity shot through her entire body. In that moment she felt more alive than she had in so long. Every part of her reacted to his touch.

He spun her around; he was so close she could hear his breathing. She quickly ripped her arm out of his grasp and stepped back. She couldn't be that close to him. She wouldn't let herself be that close to him.

"Bella," he choked out. "I…how…" His relief and pain all mixed together created an odd look.

She stared into his eyes. Eyes she had thought of endlessly. They held everything she wanted to see. She hated that.

Her eyes narrowed slightly. "I'm not Bella," she said firmly.

"Of course you are," Emmett said simply, his voice still betraying his shock. "We do remember…"

"I'm not Bella," she repeated, interrupting him.

Edward looked at her intently. He went to advance forward, but she immediately stepped back. He froze in place. "We…we thought…that you were dead."

"Bella is dead," she replied icily. "There's a gravestone to prove it…go take a look."

He winced at her words, and she found that it pained her. Her face softened slightly. But her resolve did not. She couldn't get herself into a situation she couldn't handle; that she didn't know how to handle. No part of her really knew how to deal with all this.

"You're…here. Bella, you're here," he said softly.

She was silent for a long time before responding. "I…walk around in a body that is Bella's. When I look in the mirror I see Bella's face. That doesn't make me Bella. I'm…not her. Not anymore." She turned to walk away.

"Bella please! Please wait." She turned slightly too look at him. "Bella…I'm so sorry." His voice was so full of pain, of agony. It cut at her. But she still couldn't. She didn't have it in her.

"It's too late to apologize."